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Like a Ghost on an Island

 

 

 

 

 

I find myself preoccupied with

hope and her playful,

silent affections with distinct

feminine pleasantries that yet

 

pervade as grandiose dreams

slip-away, little by little like tears

shed in a hard southern rain, never

to be captured again.

 

Even now, at a distance, her

clever words do touch something

within me, reminding, she

still harbors tender want

 

kept alive, keenly fostered

like a beautiful butterfly

in a jar, and I feel her

love is never far,

 

eagerly waiting for fate

to assist, or her heart, to cast

an impassioned spell into

the winds of change.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

In a list

A contest entry

Please tell me what you think

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    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression? Line numbers
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Comments

1 - 10 of 10

  • adsaige gold member
    May 28

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    Judged

    content: 20
    grammar: 20
    message: 20
    revelence: 20
    impact: 40 (extra brownies)


    I felt a deep connection with this piece. I really enjoyed it. very beautiful.
  • very nice this was a pleasure reading yiour melodies of poetry good luck in this contest
  • yearning, longing, wishing [all of those things that I am sure we all are or at least familiar with at one time in our lives]This is written so tenderly, yet there are also subtle tones of sensuality, and that is what makes this the sort of write that spans across distances and keyboards and I am sure makes every reader sigh softly [be it that they relate at present, or be it that they remember the past]. Also liked the closing stanza which leaves room for hope to forever remain and dwell on possibilities. I wish you the best......in the contest , but also in fate [in case this is a personal write]
    z
    reenie


  • ardentMarch gold member
    March 14
    Edit | Reply
    oh - I love this one....excellent..

  • oh daddy you always write so beautifully wth a depth of deep and true emotions from your big heart. Love you

  • Anther beautiful poem from your heart.



  • such want, and my favorite emotion, longing, is strewn throughout this magnificent write.
    if this is a pursuit for you, well then, i wish you the best

  • kiwigirljacks gold member
    March 14

    Edit | Reply
    *sigh*
    Wow... speechless.. absolutely perfect for the prompt.

    This will full of soft yearning and love. Sensual in a most precious way!

    Beautiful work!!!


  • Zero the Hero silver member
    March 14

    Edit | Reply
    lovely write great word choice and flow i could feel the passion in your words thanks for penning such good work and shareing it
    good luck


  • CountryCousin
    March 14

    Edit | Reply

    Well.

    Again this is a highly sensual piece and it could almost be said that it is talking about Patrick Swayze the actor with cancer. Of his incredible dance with the young woman and once again in the movie Ghost. This is well done.

1 - 10 of 10