You convince me to discover heights
that frees volumes of a caged soul
You enrich intimacy with just deep sighs
So lure me,lure me to a world
where fascinating mysteries revolve
where silence is the mother language of all
Oh how appealing is this immortal serenity
No more laughs of insanity
No more lectures of sanity
Just long glances & smiles
sharing a bond with nature
But Alas,this charm fades when
strikes the scenario of pain
silence now creates a dilemma
No more words of comfort
No more music to heal
Just pin drop silence so fierce
(SILENCE)
Author notes
Both sides of silence
A contest entry
- this is what i sound like. by aanika.
3500 points, ended November 28, 26 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 22 of 22
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In relation to your author's note, I really do like all the dichotomies in your work. I think it is a stylistic device for you and one which is extremely effective in getting your message across in a way which is very enjoyable for the reader.
I can see why you have received so much applause for this. It is a very good piece, indeed!
I like the third stanza the most. The dichotomy, as I have already mentioned, between insanity and sanity is really cool. I like the fact that the pattern is broken up with the word 'nature' at the end of the stanza. Really cool and kinda syncopated.
Excellent read, really enjoyed this one!
Id X
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nice poem ..enjoyed it...the silence speaks volumes...
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Güzeldi (It was nice.
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Nice flow of words,
i would like to read more from you.
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Favoured by me
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Yeah i must say i am moved by the poem, what a great poem, what a perfect word selection and you have made all the stanzas having heir own meaning, good job done my honey
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No more laughs of insanity
No more lectures of sanity
Just long glances & smiles
sharing a bond with nature... i really like this stanza
silence has it approach when nothing could be said, like warning of vivid storm or like a mad person just in love...
you touched on both the sides of silence..
beautifully done
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i like this poem... uv written it soo nicely.. keep up the goood work
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A beautiful and well written poem. Silence is often a sanctuary.
"No More words of comfort No more music to heal"
A very strong set of words cause its so true...silence can take away great things.
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where silence is the mother language of all.. the line says a lot.. Silence is I think one place where one can feel home, ponder over life, make decisions.. Beautiful poem, one topic that really hits home! Keep writing
Love, ~ Lonely
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I loved the poem, except for the word "sights" in the third line, that jarred me. Then I read comments and saw that I was not alone. Perhaps a typo? Anyway, in total I commend the poem.
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Well thanks for your kind comment.And yes its a typo.thanks for pointing it out.
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I have been in this type of situation many times and you've captured the feeling.
Wonderful writing, great imagery, keep it up.
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We all get into such situations once in a while..isn't it..I was just in a mood to observe the surroundings..thanks for your kind comment.
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Only one mistake that I could see (maybe you wanted it like that) but the spelling of sighs (sights)..3rd line first stanza..made the poem slip just a little, otherwise its beautiful..both sides of silence..
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yeah that was just a typo I've now fixed.thanks for your kind comment
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yes there is much to learn in the silence, there is also much to learn in sound. very interesting piece. I appreciate what it stirs up in the reader, or at least this reader
pen on poet,
creatress
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Creatress I'm glad you liked it thanks
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meditation
Hello there Autumn Poet.
This is an interesting free-verse meditation on silence and pain. I think it ends well with this stanza:
No more words of comfort
No more music to heal
Just pin drop silence so fierce
I'm not so sure that the following two lines about being deluded and then the capitalized word SILENCE at the end add too much more to what already has been so well written in the preceding stanzas.
Your poem makes me think that although there may be silence around us, there is always some sort of noise going on in our minds.
Kind regards,
BJ.
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ukelova thanks for dropping by here to comment..
as you say neither am I sure with the last lines..it was just written to conclude the poem.
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You catch well the qualities of silence. The fulll one rich in the spirit, strong as it comes to complete the heart, open the ear to the richness of world before man's noise; the empty one that leaves us in tears for what is missing. Excellent awareness expressed.
Peace,
Tom B.
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thanks tom for your kind comment...
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