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Drunk Slut

I'm gonna get drunk
I wanna get faded
Get so fucked up
That my mind is jaded

It will be nice
Not to think for a while
Pass me that Jager
It's just my style

So here we go
I down a shot
Give me a bowl
So we can smoke some pot

It's true what they say
I'm a fucking lush
But everything I do
I keep hush hush

A contest entry

Please tell me what you think

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Comments

1 - 13 of 13

  • Tawariell
    August 21, 2009

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    The first stanza rolls of the tungoe as a rap beat almost, the rest seems to hang lazily in the air as a poem. It's quite a contrast. Although it is good work it doesn't matter all my parsnips!

    Nice work keep typing and best of luck
    Gorecki


  • pineapple-eyes
    July 9, 2009

    Edit | Reply
    Really like this too.....
    only thing I would change is

    take the "some" out of the line
    So we can smoke some pot

    just for the sake of flow
    (only my opinion)

    good luck in contest!
    x


  • Budart
    July 9, 2009

    Edit | Reply
    Get a heavy drum and bass line behind this and I believe you have a HIT! The problem with substance abuse is that sooner or later it interferes with making the money you need to keep it going. So start becoming rich and famous as soon as possible.


  • Matt E. Smith gold member
    July 8, 2009
    Edit | Reply
    lol i liked this....i'll keep it on the dl.

  • Antebellum
    June 25, 2009

    Edit | Reply
    nice write.

    I know its not funny, but I honestly had to laugh. I know so many people this would fit, and in this- its seems like your proud of this.

    its a nice write, but if this is true I'd never admit it.

    good luck


  • Ted E Bare gold member
    June 23, 2009

    Edit | Reply
    Never tried the pot thing, but have been known on occasion to get some drinks in me then I become a cheap date for I'm easy (with alcohol consumption). Enjoyed it and had to pick it first of yours for the title alone (thought the title was funny). I want to thank you for your entry into the following contest: "To Be Put On My Favorites List."

    Ted E

    PS: Your entry has been blessed by the three wise clappers, but don't spend the whole nine points in one place(lol)!


  • RawrSmileBabyPlz
    July 2, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Wow kinda reminds me of someone i know :| this is very well written and i liked it alot. thanks for entering my contest i wish you the best of luck.
    ..<3..
    Shelly


  • TheQuietStorm
    June 2, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    i can totally relate to this poem on so many levels! amazing! thank you so much for entering my contest and i wish you the best of luck! ~CarnalNineTailedFox


  • xCandieKissesx
    May 14, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    Well, well, well, If you haven't noticed I'm 13 and not much of a drunk, nor drug addict. Not really into that whole thing. Couldn't understand which swearing words went where because it showed up as *bunny*. Anywho, Good write? Thanks for your entry and good luck!

    + Jackie


  • lilblueeyesmine1978
    May 7, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    this is cute and describingly obvious. Thsnks fro entering and i hope to read more from you soon.


  • LadyUnique silver member
    May 3, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    thank you for entering and good luck


  • daviscth
    April 30, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    LOL. The last lines were wonderful!! Good luck in the contest.


  • Melissa Burns
    April 17, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    I love the last few lines, ...' I'm a fucking llush, but everything I do, I keep hush hush' interesting poem

1 - 13 of 13