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A hostage

I am nothing,
but a piece of art,paint by you.
A prize.
Constantly repainted
for your satisfaction.
Hidden,
behind this illusion of yours,
Mommy's gold star.

Author notes

I hope you like it.I thought maybe I give it a shot at this contset and try your poetic form.Sorry if it doesn't sound that good.

Modulus Form II
(4, 8, 2, 6, 6, 2, 8, 4)
8 Lines and 40 Syllables total

Modulus Poetic Form
by David R. Hall aka Poetic-Theorem

All right reserved

A contest entry

Please tell me what you think as i'm trying to improve my english

    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
    • Line numbers  • Invite them to read
    : no Cost: 0 free left 0 points, You have (?)

Comments


  • Poetic-Theorem gold member
    March 12, 2008

    Edit | Reply

    Spledid job

    Lovely write using the Modulus II form.
    Perfect form and flows well.
    "Hidden,
    behind this illusion of yours,
    Mommy's gold star."

    My personal fav words but I love the entire write as well

    I hope you like the form and shall play with it some more. Mixing and matching the different forms works very well together [in my opinion]. I was not sure at first. It is those entering my contest that is bringing beauty to my new poetic form. I appreciate you very much!

    Thanks for entering my contest and I wish you the best of luck.
    ~David~


  • Lost In Dreaming
    March 12, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    wow-i think this is beautiful, i love it--this is a cool form of poetry i think it sounds good nad cool topic

    ♥ meg