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Lost

The path divided when she lost her way,
her spirits were grey when she lost her way.

She came to a man, who seemed so forlorn,
and she heard him say; “she has lost her way”.

She veered from the path in the forest green,
she has gone astray, she has lost her way.

The dark clouds moved in and nightfall came,
‘twas the end of the day, she has lost her way.

She sat near the path in the shade of a tree,
where Amera did stay when she lost her way.

 

 

 

Author notes

Ghazal:
A Ghazal is a poem that is made up like an odd numbered chain of couplets, where each couplet is an independent poem. It should be natural to put a comma at the end of the first line. The Ghazal has a refrain of one to three words that repeat, and an inline rhyme that precedes the refrain. Lines 1 and 2, then every second line has this refrain and inline rhyme, and the last couplet should refer to the authors pen-name... The rhyming scheme is AA bA cA dA eA etc.

In a list

A contest entry

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Comments

1 - 21 of 21
  • two appluase

  • It's better.


  • Cyber Artist Moderators member
    April 25, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Unfortunately this contest is being judged by a Moderator

    sadly I am not familiar with this format a sad journey a metaphor for life as we often take the wrong path
    cyberartist MODERATOR


  • myrataal silver member
    April 3, 2008

    Edit | Reply

    I loved this ...

    and I am going to keep it forever.

    You pen wondrous poetry: as perfect as can be.



    Love
    Myra


  • maa gold member
    March 29, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    I never tried a ghazal, thank you for the precious info on the form-rules ... you did a wonderful job with this verse, both in structure and content ...

    wishing you all the best,
    marion


    • Amera gold member
      March 29, 2008
      Edit | Reply
      Oh thank you Sis, yes, it is a challenging form. You really have to think to be creative.


  • rhondasail
    March 15, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Being a fan of the traditional ghazal, I like this very much. I would even say this is your best yet in this form. Best of luck in the contest. Peace, Rhonda


  • Desire gold member
    March 13, 2008

    Edit | Reply

    Wow~~

    I have yet to try this form and am anxious to give it a whirl


    Oy!!

    This flowed from one line to the next~
    and the repetition added to the intensity of the piece
    when she lost her way...
    ..she has lost her way

    Loved this creation too~
    Keep that quill dancing...
    Thank You for sharing Your Talent and Spirit~
    Many blessings to You in the contest Sweet One
    Best wishes too
    and much love~ Desire~*~


  • Mairi bheag gold member
    March 13, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Hmmm... someone started a contest for Ghazal... interesting.

    The repeated words are song-like, as if a few notes of melody are repeated. I love the way you handle this form, but I would also love to see you write a longer one - I am sure you can sustain the momentum.


  • HeavensDaughter
    March 12, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Wow! I always impressed by how you seem to take these very complicated poetic forms and make them flow. You make it look easy and natural. I really enjoyed reading this unusual style. You wrote it in such a way that the repetition did not drive me nuts! LOL

    Excellent write!


  • StarEyes
    March 12, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    I really am gonna have to learn this form. It glides soooooo easily off the tongue!

    But then again, everything seems that way with you!

    What a great job you did on this one!

    Best of luck in this contest!!

    and love

    Nyetta


  • PerVirtuous
    March 11, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Wonderful. I get the image and see your meaning. Thanks for sharing this. I don't know the form well enough to comment on it yet, but will learn it.


  • Ithica silver member
    March 11, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    The repeating line really accentuates how lost "she" is... A lucky girl tho' to have Amera there to guide her home! This Ghazal form is pretty cute as you have written it! Of course you can write "anything"


  • Pure Thought silver member
    March 11, 2008
    Edit | Reply

    She has lost her way?

    Not poetically today!

    Excellently written.

  • Papagallo
    March 11, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    This was quite good and an enjoyable read. Thanks fro sharing your work with us. Good luck in the contest!


  • poeticweaver gold member
    March 11, 2008

    Edit | Reply

    Excellent!

    I really enjoy reading these new forms.
    I know you know so many teach. You rock like that!
    Thanks for sharing, and all the best within the contest!

    Peace, Timothy


  • MJ Donnelly gold member
    March 11, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Wow, I am beginning to enjoy these Lady Amera, but then again I enjoy anything you write.


    Love and peace,
    mj.


  • cricketjeff gold member
    March 11, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    You are very into these!
    I shall look at the contest and maybe give it a whirl
    I do like this one, very soft and serene


  • PassionsPromise gold member
    March 11, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    May I come and sit with you? Maybe I can sit and see where the day will take me....As always Princess, I loved this and I love you. Great Job.

    Mistress Passions


  • Cerulean Sunrise gold member
    March 11, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    This had that eerie good feel to it.
    Nice form.
    Enjoyed as always!


  • Faeryn
    March 11, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    Excellent poem, Amera. Sad but very good. I love you
    Tay

1 - 21 of 21