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Eyes Wide Shut



Self pity falls upon my back
while I scream "wolf" for suffering
that I have not truly known.
Comprehension slaps hard against my cheek,
as I run head on into my glass bubble
of which reality lies beyond.
Head hitting my knees, I cry
for the children who know not love,
the baby that never took a breath
the drug addict who slipped
through the cracks of society 

left unnoticed; unclaimed, in life's morgue;

war-torn countries where innocent families

do not even understand why they have no homes

to return to, as they mourn the death of loved ones.

 

With shame, I linger in thoughts once forgotten,
while hiding in my ivory tower of want,
as a mother digs through wasteland of our
disposable yesterdays and tomorrows,
longing to feed her children's starving
bellies, buying time for one more meal.
As I remove my rose colored glasses,
I find myself standing in the shelter of Grace;
thus I begin to suffocate in my own greed,
vowing to never lie down in my ignorance again,

knowing I shall now stand for something,

and that something, shall make a difference,

one voice, one small step at a time.

 

In a list

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Comments

1 - 64 of 64
  • krizaa
    September 24

    Edit | Reply
    It's overwhelming when you think about all the wrong in the world. "what can I do that'll make even the smallest dent" is what often stops us from doing anything at all. but even a small gesture that makes a difference in the life of one other human being is worth while.

    I'm sure you must've been really touched by something... an image or an incident that made you write this. All the images in this write are powerful. The mother digging through a dump... that's the one that'll stay with me.

  • carole21
    September 22

    Edit | Reply
    very nicely penned . . liked "I find myself standing in the shelter of Grace" and "I begin to suffocate in my own greed" . . congrats on the trophies . . well done & an honest viewpoint . .

  • Damien 666
    September 9
    Edit | Reply
    amazing write


  • whispernthedark gold member
    August 22

    Edit | Reply
    Wow. This is wonderful, and what a hard thing it is to take off those glasses, but extremely necessary. Thank you for entering the contest, good luck. And congratulations on your prior wins, it is much deserving.


    whisper

  • Kazytc gold member
    July 25

    Edit | Reply

    Brilliant!

    Wow this is brilliant I love the line that goes "the drug addict who slipped through the cracks of society"... 'slipped through the crack of society' now that is extremely clever stuff, what a brilliant line!. You pen to perfection poetically with such gra[hic artistry and fine sculpting too, so rich and well used are the chosen descriptives and flow and rhyme perfect too, Gee this is a ppetic masterpiece! Love it, bravo well done just love the powerful and impactual sentiments and ambiance.
    Poetic Hugs,
    Kaz.
    Kazytc xx


  • Grey Mouser
    July 10
    Edit | Reply
    This blew me away the first time I read it and it still is emotionally charged and with powerful meaning. The depth felt for the worlds downtrodden and less than fortunate resonates within the write fully. Well done and many thanks for entering into the contest.
    Mouser
  • Very powerful and expressive, raw too.
  • This is very wow.
    Very well done.
    Thanks for entering.
    Very interesting,
    a good write.

    ...Simply Me♥

  • catie052 gold member
    May 7

    Edit | Reply

    This is absolutely beautiful...you have a way with words and imagery. one of the best i have read on this site


  • eoz
    May 2

    Edit | Reply
    I think I love most about this poem, it's hope in the end, that one small voice can make a difference;
    consider my voice added to yours

  • very well done and thank you for entertaining me and entering this lovely piece into my contest!

  • really well done

  • A most excellent piece of poetry! So very powerful and so wonderfully written!
    All the best to you in the contests!!!

  • crazymomma
    April 30

    Edit | Reply
    "It's not having what you want but wanting what you got" This is very good. Good luck in the contest.


  • TabbyJoy
    April 30

    Edit | Reply
    This is really good. The message is very powerful. Most people never find happiness because they are never content. They are never thankful. If we only realize all that we have been given, we cannot help but seek to help the less fortunate.


  • poeticweaver gold member
    April 29

    Edit | Reply

    Excellent

    We have to stand up for what we believe is right.
    Thanks for sharing, and always good reading a kind soul such as yourself.

    Peace, Timothy

  • celadia
    April 24
    Edit | Reply
    Heartfelt and beautiful, it's going to be hard to decide a winner in this contest.

  • So very well done, my friend
    Written exceptional
    All the best to you in this contest!

  • carole21
    April 21
    Edit | Reply

    excellent

    a wonderful excellent write for the prompt . . you touch many areas . . so much truth in this great write . . well done . . congrats on the trophy


  • calendar girl
    April 19

    Edit | Reply
    i can't really put into words how i feel about this.
    it's kind of cynical, but also not, so... i dunno.
    good job =]
  • Your words are so real and deeply touching! never feel sorry for ones self for there is always someone worse off than we...Niaish so much for sharing your beautiful heart with me and for enter

  • loved this line "left unnoticed; unclaimed, in life's morgue" this one line jumped out and grabbed me...best of luck to you


  • BluesMan gold member
    April 14
    Edit | Reply

    The moral of this contest is never feel sorry for yourself because there is always somebody out there far worse off! I really enjoyed reading this poem. This is exactly what I was looking for Thank you for entering my contest

  • this is very beautiful! i have written many poems like this one. thank you so much for entering my contest and i wish you the best of luck! NineTailedFox

  • Noah20Tymatal
    April 13

    Edit | Reply
    WOW Reality staring us right in the face and refusing to back down. Wallowing in self-pity until we see how worse it could be. A great write!
    Peace in light and love
    Noah

    . Rewarded 4


  • paulcreates silver member
    April 13

    Edit | Reply

    ..yes..

    You have done a wonderful job with this. It is a theme that "humanity" will always benefit from hearing especially us who often take our "freedom" for granted.


  • Pandorea
    April 9
    Edit | Reply
    oh wow. this is a great poem. nothing more to say.


  • yourhot21
    April 9
    Edit | Reply
    Wow! This was breathtaking! I could feel this poem! Very well written! Great job!


  • Swan song gold member
    March 31
    Edit | Reply
    That is how it is done!!!! This was a soul full!
    I can relate to this!!!!


  • Dark Otter gold member
    March 29

    Edit | Reply

    Mysticstorm

    Keep doing what you're doing. An activist can change the cycle of violence. Just be the strong voice that sings. Thanks for the read

  • Oraculus
    March 17

    Edit | Reply

    Beauty from Ugliness!

    This poem has most assuredly delivered a fresh quirk to an old conundrum of our fallen world's finite trashcan: good thing your reaction to reality of the illusion is positive. The poetry is actually quite good and you seem to have invested a lot of work here. Fortunately I'm immune to the illusion of worldly life in death, so my senses appreciate only your fine delivery of old hat... DW

    . Rewarded 8


  • grannyeri gold member
    March 16

    Edit | Reply
    Ooops, sorry I was here before. has to be a way we can remember who we've commented on and what poems they are. Enjoyed it the second time round too.

  • Ludovica
    March 16

    Edit | Reply

    broad and deep

    I enjoyed reading this, and the flow of the lines, especially when read aloud, really packs a punch.
    "thus I begin to suffocate in my own greed/vowing to never lie down in my ignorance again/knowing I shall now stand for something/and that something, shall make a difference/one voice, one small step at a time.", I found truly inspiring. I hope you do well in the contest, and continue to write such moving pieces.
  • the baby that never took a breath
    the drug addict who slipped
    through the cracks of society
    left unnoticed; unclaimed, in life's morgue;

    This poem is fantastic and the above metaphor was absolutely amazing, really glad I read this it's wonderful work,

    . Rewarded 6


  • kitty23
    March 16

    Edit | Reply

    great

    this makes me sad cause it reminds me of me
    and its sad how much time you waist wishing you could have something better when you have something great right in front of you eyes

    amazing you have powerful expressions in here your really good

    keep writing

    oh just between us

    *i cried* shhh lol

    . Rewarded 6

  • Love it

    IT's soo true we don't realize how good we've got it until we met someone who would kill for what we have....very very good poem....finalist

  • Mairi bheag gold member
    March 14

    Edit | Reply
    Took me a couple of reads to get into it, but I can really see how you have interpreted the prompt. Good work - hope it does well in the contest.

    . Rewarded 4

  • ginniirox
    March 14
    Edit | Reply
    Wow, this is really deep... What inspiration you have! This is truly beautifu

  • katscradle
    March 14

    Edit | Reply

    excellent poem

    i liked it very much, its deep and very poignient i enjoyed reading it your title catches the eye as there is a movie out there by the same name good luck in t his contest

  • neurosine gold member
    March 14
    Edit | Reply
    You know little of these things and you're crying for yourself. I'm hep to you.

  • Hunsignatr
    March 14
    Edit | Reply
    I like that =]
    Really wonderful job!!

    -Ian

  • twaintwine gold member
    March 14

    Edit | Reply

    What did you say, Plato?

    That Socrates said, knowing your own foolishness is the beginning of wisdom...just the very beginning. Let's get started?
    Listen to my original music at www.nakedadam.net
  • this was truly outstanding...and so so true of life...so often we wollow in self pity over our pathetic little problems we dont even think outside of ourselves at the people in the world who have it far worse. we can be so self absorbed cant we? and i loved the way you ended it. im really blown away by this.

    great job hun,

  • mmook
    March 12

    Edit | Reply
    we need not be so selfish ... when there are people who are unforfunate great message .. appreciate what you got.. thanks for great lesson thanks for sharing

    . Rewarded 4


  • ShellyoConnor
    March 12

    Edit | Reply
    This is excellently written.
    Flows really well
    A very artistic way to tell us to get our acts together and think about those less fortunate than us.

    . Rewarded 4

  • Latradi
    March 12
    Edit | Reply
    What a wonderful poem and a great message it sends out to all of us who are too selfish and ignorant to look at really misery in the world.
    Well done, I loved how you created pictures of the world today. Makes me feel sad how easy it is to find such images nowadays...
    Take care,
    Latradi

  • mama-drama
    March 12

    Edit | Reply
    This poem really touched me.It is written with so much emotion.
    I love it..and the way you bare out your soul and just look at the simple things in life.
    Its truly beautiful and eye opening.

  • Irial
    March 12

    Edit | Reply
    well well... a piece of melancholic beauty. Seems these thoughts are common among todays people... and eventhough we all feel it we do not really do anything do we? This cradle of soft warm wool is not a good thing eventhough we give it credit to be... for what do we really have to live for? There's no struggle except against the system made to protect us... w00t... let's all go and buy more anti-depressive pills and forget people in poor countries loves to live cuz their struggle brings life into perspective... as we are all about to discover once asia takes over the worlds economy and we in the west fall from Mamons grace.

    . Rewarded 8


  • grannyeri gold member
    March 12
    Edit | Reply
    Enjoyed reading this awesome write. Liked the way you took this prompt and made it your own. Great flow, and powerful message. Not sure what it takes to make us see the world in a different light; us included. What epiphany is it that suddenly opens our eyes to the real us; the real earth and then causes us to change. How often we are jealous of what others have; not being thankful for all the things that we have too. Other might be envious of us at the same time. Wonderful metaphors too.

    . Rewarded 8

  • I loved it, a lot of meaning is expressed!" With shame, I linger in thoughts once forgotten,
    while hiding in my ivory tower of want," I especially like these lines.

    . Rewarded 4


  • Grey Mouser
    March 11

    Edit | Reply
    The blinders we wear to delude ourselves from reality, place the burden of failure on others, because we do not wish to be held accountable for what we should be doing. So we complain, procrastinate, etc... about all the little things that we cannot do or enjoy, when we have so much more than so many others.
    When those blinders come off we finally see and make this affirmation to be more aware and giving to those in need and it takes but one step to start down this path and blaze a trail for others to follow. By doing so, one soul can change the world we dwell upon for the better.
    Amazingly profound and meaningful write sweety, so true!
    Best to you.

    Love,
    Mouser
    Sun and stars shine no brighter than you!!!


  • imahealer gold member
    March 11

    Edit | Reply
    Such an awakening! We all make the mistake of complaining about what we don't have instead of being grateful for what we have. Your poem is beautifully written, and opens our eyes to those who have not.There is one place that is bumpy."of which reality lies'. IT really should read "where". Other than that, this is a truly humbling poem. After the contest is over, I plan on placing this in the spotlight. Whiners should know that we all have what we need, not what we want. IN my eyes, this should be a winner!
    Much love,
    Shana

  • DannySherwood
    March 11

    Edit | Reply

    powerful

    I liked the way you used metaphor to describe the human condition. This is a brilliant observation of the tragedies of the human existance.

    . Rewarded 4


  • AlwaysbeBIG
    March 11

    Edit | Reply

    There you go...

    I don't say this lightly, but this was a powerful poem, and I loved it. It has a very "real" feeling to it.

    Indeed some of us are lucky.
    And what about those individuals who fall between the cracks, does anyone care?
    We all have a voice, and we must use it.


    The first line of the second stanza, I think could flow a little better by changing the second "in" to "with", which could also create some sublt alliteration with the want, and first word of the second line "while"


    "In shame I linger in thoughts once forgotten
    while hiding in my ivory tower of want,
    as a mother digs through wasteland of our
    disposable yesterdays and tomorrows"

    Christ, those were powerful lines.

    KEEP IT UP KIM!

    Brandon

    . Rewarded 8


  • Terry-too silver member
    March 11

    Edit | Reply
    We, the lucky ones who live,
    insulated from the heavy woes
    so much of humanity knows,
    need poems like yours, to give
    understanding and perspective,
    sharing the truth you chose
    fully, clearly to disclose.

    Well done!
    Terry

  • Brilliant and vivid piece. It connects strongly with one's emotions. Well written


  • jbbrandi
    March 11

    Edit | Reply

    Wow

    This is so deep and touching...it really made me think...about how lucky some of us are...and about it all. I've really got nothing left to say, which means you did very well! I'm astounded! Amazing write!

    . Rewarded 4

  • Great write full of meaning and heartfelt words. I love the imagery and the metaphores used. Great piece.


  • Shancy Fayre
    March 11

    Edit | Reply
    A beautiful piece which I enjoyed reading, finding myself in need of hearing what you've said. Thank you for writing this and thank you for sharing it. Shancy.

    . Rewarded 4


  • Tam gold member
    March 11

    Edit | Reply

    oh sis...

    this is so profound and touching...
    you really touch souls with your writes...
    your honest look at self and soul are moving beyond words...
    I love where you took this prompt...and this is yet further proof why you are one of the best writers on AP...your talent and heart combine into stellar poetry...
    damn good write sis...begging for gold tin...
    I am so honored to call you my sister...
    I love you!
    Tammy


  • Dark Otter gold member
    March 11
    Edit | Reply

    Hello Mysticstorm

    I like to live in my self pity. It tends to insulate from everyone else's pain. The activists on this website sometimes take me out of myself and force me to examine issue that I would not rather see. Thanks

    . Rewarded 4

  • This is a very great poem that is dark and very interesting, it keeps you on the edge of your seat and it is very mysterious...i love it!!!!

    Becca

    . Rewarded 4


  • LadyLonestar
    March 11
    Edit | Reply
    A tad bit morbid, but it's a great poem.

1 - 64 of 64