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Torn in Two

I can't take this anymore,
i'm being torn in two,
i'm hate this reality,
i wish to be through.

I love you more than you know,
it pains me not to be with you,
but god has played a cruel trick on me,
and given my heart to two.

What am i to do,
when i can't decide who,
who i am to love,
and who i will hurt.

She likes me,
but she likes me,too,
i hate to choose,
i care for them both.

I'm torn in mind, body, and soul,
now i've hurt one,
and in my chest is a hole.


Author notes

My first attempt at a love poem...it f*ckin sux, but writing it helped me think things out...
Written December 1st, 2003

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Comments

1 - 12 of 12

  • SoadBabyGurl77
    December 29, 2003
    Edit | Reply
    wow, sounds like a big decision, but just go with your heart and whatever you think will be right, dont worry, even hurting the other person, people get over things, it'll all be okay, this is an awesome poem, i think its a wonderful first love poem
    ~Love Always~
    ~Laurin~

  • guppiegirl15
    December 14, 2003
    Edit | Reply
    oOo brandon this is really good... i think i should no who the 2 ppl r. and u didnt hurt my feelings.. im just kicking myself in the ass for not saying yes and obeying my mom...anyways u should write like this more often.. i really like it! and i no ppl say this all the time but i really mean it.. great job!


  • December 12, 2003
    Edit | Reply
    o wow brandon, Im guessing I know who this is about. great job and as you know Im totally relating to this right now(you know via im) lmao great job I like it and think you should right like this more often.
    jen


  • Broken Soul1109
    December 9, 2003
    Edit | Reply
    IU've been in a situation like that...it's hard..it's really hard, but I think you put it out on paper so well, and I hope that you made the choice that you wanted. It truly doesn't suck....poetry is about thoughts feelings and emotions, and I think you did a wonderful job getting those all out here...I hope to read more of your works in the future.

  • DrawingLS
    December 7, 2003
    Edit | Reply
    Nice poem. That's all I really have to say about this one, since I already know it was about. Yeah.
    Lola

  • Nights
    December 5, 2003
    Edit | Reply
    Not bad for a first attempt at a love poem. I liked it. Very good.

    Ender


  • Leah Rose
    December 2, 2003
    Edit | Reply
    Naturally I love all your work, and this is just the same, it was amazing. Anyways, I'm at school and bored, so i'm just going to fly.

    peace and love!!!! you rock!

    Leah

    sXe


  • Auslander
    December 1, 2003
    Edit | Reply
    thanks, everybody....i got to check all your stuff!


  • Crimson Dream
    December 1, 2003
    Edit | Reply

    hella good!

    CHA! your dead wrong! thats a kics ass poem! it's sad. and I know how much it hurts to choose between two people. its no easy task. your poem basicly decsribes the entire thing.

    I like the lines.
    "I love you more than you know,
    it pains me not to be with you,
    but god has played a cruel trick on me,
    and given my heart to two.

    What am i to do,
    when i can't decide who,
    who i am to love,
    and who i will hurt."

    Very powerful.

    WOW! nice rhyming! in my poem I'f I attempt a rhyme it goes horrabily wrong. LOL. yes yes yes, my poem have no rhyme in them what so ever (accept like 3 but thats different. LOL) oops! this is about you not me! SRY! lol. well great write. I'll keep an eye on you. Good luck and keep that pen flowing!

    ~Lucas~

  • MollysWall
    December 1, 2003
    Edit | Reply
    I like this it doesn't suck. I think its great to use writing as a release of sorts and a form of therapy also ~especially when you are good at it.
    I hope everything works out for you. Good luck

    ~M~


  • December 1, 2003
    Edit | Reply
    aww. I dont think this piece sucks. Its deep. and.. Being in that position absolutely sucks. For sure. You expressed it well, and you know, Its good it helped you think thigns out, cause i think the best reason to write poetry is for yourself. and thats what you did. great piece.
    bravo
    <3 Fru <3


  • -Twilight-
    December 1, 2003
    Edit | Reply
    This is a nice write, writing always seems to help, especially with hard decisions, or just needing to get some frustration out. I like the title, "Torn in Two" because it shows that you are having difficulty deciding between two people. Well good job and I hope everything works out.

    **(((Steph)))*

1 - 12 of 12