It's a veritable flea market
open twenty four hours,
for our entire lifetime.
Offering dreams for sale,
some battered and used,
holding just a glimpse of hope,
others seldom touched,
brand new and seeking your claim.
Purchased in sweat,
and a great struggle,
to carry it to a place where you can,
bring it home to your heart and make it real.
But beware, there are hucksters
and sham artists everywhere,
selling ripoffs and counterfeit chances,
One must choose carefully what they will cherish.
I would buy peace, not only for my troubled soul,
but for all of the lonely, the war torn, and the hungry,
I would simply give it away,
keeping a bit for myself,
and then portioning it out to all of the world,
to every soul that is worthy.
Then for those I feel who deserve less,
I would offer them a chance to make good,
on all the harm that they have caused,
and earn by their renunciation of evil,
just a bit of the peace I long to share.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Artis
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To simply purchase your dreams, to own them and use them daily. To bring back a long lost love, and hold her in your arms, or your mom who has been gone for what seems ages, to chat with again, hug, laugh and cry with her like old times. To use your dreams gained to make your business a success from the mire of its failure, like you used to dream it would be, To end war! What bells would ring out across the world over that, while soldiers leap and women weep with joy. I like this poem because it touches on the essence of our souls, our dreams, and how valuable they are to us. What price could possibly be set for such wealth. Perhaps heaven is where all of our dreams of purity will be realized. Who knows. Perhaps Poet Beddoes has found his dreams.~~Artis
A contest entry
- Dreams for Sale by Old Poetry.
700 points, ended March 26, 2008, 7 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
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To JIM: I-like-rhymes_
This is not meant to be a negative comment in reply to you...just a statement of why i wrote this poem the way i did. Thanks for your great comment as well.
Good poetry both disturbs, moves, brings tears, makes angry and brings joy to all, obviously I have succeeded with you on some of those counts. Most dreams have been hashed and re-hashed over the centuries, most are used, secondhand hopes from eons past. most flea markets offer brand new merchandise and old merchandise today. And yes there are conditions on peace, why would I award bin laden, or charles manson, or any of the many predators and murders and scum peace. let them suffer in the hell of chaos, usually of their own making. that would give peace doublefold to the victims of their madness. Just a reality check on how I'd spend my dreams. Where is yours?? -
On the first reading I was impressed by both the imagery used and the dream envisioned. On closer scrutiny My literal mind became slightly confused.
The image of second hand dreams conjured up by your line "It's a veritable flea market" would put this firmly in the category of spent dreams in my mind. You do bring it back with the line "brand new and seeking your claim" so this has produced a mixed image for me of a tatty dream not worth much. Indeed your line about shysters and hucksters echoes that thought.
So when you bought your dream (and I liked the idea of using sweat as your currency) it was not too much of a surprise that you put a condition upon the distribution of peace rather than truly give peace for all. I began to feel "Oh no another conditional offer another con."
That is how much your poem effected me. I became enmeshed in the reality of your illusion and isn't that what good poetry should do to the reader.
So thank you for exercising my mind with your offering.
Good luck in the contest.
Jim
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I like this - a gift of peace and a lesson to learn for those that need it. I too like the idea of buying a 2nd hand dream - hoping that this would bring ourselves peace and/or joy in some small measure then it isn't lain to waste.
I feel you have it covered. - just a comment from the original poem in your notes and then the criteria is complete.
Thank You
Von - Oldpoetry
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