Beat
Music
Horns lament
Symphonic play
Song
~
Meet
Lovers
Eye contact
Smiling glances
Touch
~
Swing
Swaying
Hand in hand
Fingers entwined
Spin
~
Feel
Flowing
Cheek to cheek
Tightly embraced
Waltz
~
Lift
Heart beat
Tender clasp
Swirling romance
Twirl
~
Dip
Passion
Music stops
Holding caress
Kiss
~
Lips
Whisper
In the ear
Seductive stare
Gone
Author notes
This is a Laturne String or Swirl type of poem. The syllable count is 1,2,3,4,1 for each stanza and you can have as many stanza's as you wish or need. Tell me what you think.
In a list
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 13 of 13
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a different form here hoever well written enjoyed this read thanks for sharing
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Thanks for reading and commenting I really appreciate it.
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your very welcome, i enjoy well thought out creativity. this is exceptional
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I'm not much of a dancer in ability, but I do enjoy it, and I could relate to the first few stanzas especially. I've never tried this form, but I like that you've strung them, as it makes it more complete, I think.
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Thank you, this is a neat form and I'm just experimenting with it, so its all new to me too. Always appreciate your comments. Thanks again.
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Neeah
I find this form to be stilted and lacking flow,
not unlike myself when I step on the dance floor.
I can identify with your last word;
my date`s limped off the floor `cuz her toes hurt.
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haha probably your poor dancing steps doesn't allow you follow the flow. The last word means they left the building. Thanks for reading and commenting, always appreciated.
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AWESOME
Oh Charley, what can I say, Im really lost for words with this write....so hang on a bit till i find my mouth.....
Well here we go,Now that i have picked my jaw up off from the floor, this is magnificent, I really mean it.I could see the dance, hear the music, feel the heartbeat of the dance partner.It is an aewsome write indeed.You are doing so well with this writing course, and I am so proud of you.My standing ovation for you on this write and if i could applause it more than once, then I would do so. You are such a pleasure to read my friend, never put your quill down, and thanks so much for sharing with us.
Take care Ck and many beautiful blessings to you
~Angel.
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Thank you Angel for your awesome comments. It means a lot to me. This was quite the challenge to write, but I liked how it came out. Thanks again your comments always are appreciated.
Charley
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BEAUTIFUL!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I thought that this was very nicely done and i enjoyed reading it. Keep up the fantastic job. send me a link to some more of your poetry if you'd like me to read more.
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Thank you for reading and commenting. This form was fun for me. I've just started doing structured poetry and lovin it. I'm taking college courses also (after a long separation) and beginning poetry writing and beginning fiction writing are two of my classes this semester. I'd love for you to read more. I'll add you to my favorites and if you do the same we can critique each others writes. Thanks again it is appreciated.
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Excellent
**STANDS AND APPLAUDS**
CK, this write is such a beautifully penned piece of poetry.
Well done my friend.
Keep up with the great work.
Keep on penning.
Thank you so very much for sahring your wonderful talents with us.
*S* Cynthia
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Thank you Cynthia, this was a pretty hard one to do. I had to pound my head on the table a couple times to come up with the right syllable count. Thanks for reading and commenting. Glad you enjoyed
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