Ever with me
Yet never there...
Just the ghost
Of memories we shared
A gentle kiss
Wakes me from sleep...
I long for the lips
That were mine to keep
A whisper in the night
Calling my name
I wake to the sound...
And I'm alone again
A caress on my face
It must be real
Your hand in my hair...
That's what I feel
Liquid topaz eyes
Burn into my soul
The smile on a face...
That made me feel whole
Wrapped in your arms
The moment we meet
But when I awake...
It's only the sheets
Oh sweet, painful memories
Torture me more
Make me feel
What I once felt before...
Ever with me
Yet never there...
Just the ghost
Of memories we shared
Author notes
"Grammy Awards for Winners participent" ~ option~ * A love so real
Mom of Blondes
Ok, so here's the poem that completes the thoughts that were started in the haiku "Memories". You should really read that one too to get the full affect.
A contest entry
- Are you up for it? Are YOU good enough? Give it a shot! OPTIONS! by Kassandra Nyktos.
600 points, ended March 16, 2008, 18 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Dangerously in Love by MzDimeDivia.
330 points, ended March 26, 2008, 20 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Hit me with your best shot by Wrozes Thorne.
365 points, ended March 19, 2008, 12 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - The love of your life... by jbbrandi.
750 points, ended March 24, 2008, 24 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Love by Beautyfull-x-Angel.
395 points, ended March 24, 2008, 11 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Give Me All You've Got (Winner Takes All) by hey charlie.
300 points, ended May 3, 2008, 50 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Peer Pressure (Vote) - 3 (last, if nobody shows interest) by xxRainbowDawnxx.
450 points, ended April 2, 2008, 12 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - ~♥~ Hopeless Romantics and Other Sad Love Poems ~♥~ by Shassidy.
525 points, ended April 21, 2008, 67 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - LETS MAKE A DOUBLE GOLD WINNER FROM YOUR GOLD WINNING POEM by Swan song.
600 points, ended April 12, 2008, 21 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - I want your BEST prewrites!! by perfectsunset.
1000 points, ended April 24, 2008, 60 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Poetic Idol (Auditions) by TwilightBloodRuns.
315 points, ended June 8, 2008, 31 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - For All Those I Gave a HM, Let's See If I Can Give You A Gold. by xxRainbowDawnxx.
1000 points, ended April 30, 2008, 6 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - ▲▼ Grammy Awards for Winners of Golden Cups ▼▲ by Rebekah-Ann.
300 points, ended May 2, 2008, 8 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - The Ultimate Goal by N e a r.
20000 points, ended June 2, 2008, 946 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 23 of 23
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such a lovely piece. I must say that the loneliness in this poem is standing out. very well done!!!!
All the best -
I can relate so much to these feelings, as sometimes I find myself missing the one I used to be with and remembering our tender moments, truly makes me FEEL.
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Excellent
Perfect!
Love the imagery and the rhyming scheme, even though you changed the beat partway, it is still the best one I have seen so far. (Even though there are 3 poems at the moment, but i started the contest a few minutes ago, lol)
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All I can say is that this is BEAUTIFUL. I really like it a lot and these lines were my fave
"Liquid topaz eyes
Burn into my soul
The smile on a face...
That made me feel whole
Wrapped in your arms
The moment we meet
But when I awake...
It's only the sheets"
Gorgeous imagery as well!
Best of luck & thanks for entering my contest
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great write
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Beautiful longing for love and well rhymed, even the off rhymes worked with this peice.
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This is a great poem! Although the idea of feeling like someone is there when they are not is really clichéd, I think this piece is a really great piece. There's a lot of wonderful imagery and the feeling of being left alone comes through really well. The title reflects the poem and is not too over-used of a title as well, so good job with that. Great job and good luck in the contest!
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wow, beautiful poem. Very deserivng of the many awards it has recieved. Good luck in the other contests and wonderful poem.
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Powerful....
The pain is conveyed beautifully thru your words.
The ending is absolutly perfect! Great write!
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Well I think you may be adding another trophy to the long list this poem has lol. Great write x
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very smooth flow and nice rhyme. very nicely brings out the longing within! a great poem..
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I really like this poem, it has a liquid fluidity that is rarely accomplished when a poem has such short lines. You are a truly gifted poet. My favorite line was "Liquid topaz eyes." I just found that simply astounding that three words could hold such imagery. The only critique I have is that you had two stanza's that were really half-rhymes that might sound like they rhymed when they really don't. Other than that, it was a really good poem. Great job and good luck.
Hugs and Kisses,
Tiphanie
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Beautiful and sad and crazy good. Thanks for entering
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this write was one of the best for the contest that I've read thus far. I thought that it was indeed worth my time to read. Keep up the great job. I'm sure you will go far in this contest. Good luck.
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Sad Sad Great write though Love the background too VCongrats on the trophies good luck with it in this contest I hope it gets lots of votes >.<
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Congrats on the HM!
A powerful piece, wonderfully penned. All the best in the contest with it
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ilikedthis poem ... ... i to have had moments like his ... ... thanx for entering and best of luck ... ...
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wow! I loved it.
"Oh sweet, painful memories
Torture me more
Make me feel
What I once felt before..."
very beautiful, these are my favorite lines. and I think it would be better if this would be the ending to the poem. but either way it's great.
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This is so incredibly powerful...it brought a tear or two to my eye. I think I can relate with this...actually, I can TOTALLY relate with this...I'm speechless, but you did an awesome job.
Good luck in the contest, and thanks for entering.
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Exquisite
I liked the exquisite painting of longing and memories intermingled throughout the poem and the final sadness of something missing.
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Oh sweet, painful memories
Torture me more
Make me feel
What I once felt before...
great lines
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Loved it
You have such a nice touch and i loved it and it was just amazing. I liked the part when it said A gentle kiss
Wakes me from sleep...
I long for the lips
That were mine to keep
Good Luck in my contest
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wow....really good.....its....haunting
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