Our souls joined at first sight
his youthful glory encompassing my fame.
We loved: a riotous burning
which fed my desire
to build cities embodying him.
I breathed him through my skin,
inhaled him as we slept.
He seemed to fill himself with me.
This morning his face glistened with tears
but he refused to tell me why.
He left our boat at the riverside
and disappeared.
Today we mark the death of Osiris:
god of the dying.
In a nearby temple chapel
ashes still warm from an offering,
and a lock of his hair.
On the lake shore: his garment and sandals
in the mud: his body.
We took him on board our boat
his soul has snared my life.
Everything is desolation
I, an empty shell,
am shaken with weeping
there is nothing now in this world.
Author notes
My 'found' poem is taken from 'Memoirs of Hadrian' by Marguerite Yourcenar. Book Society edition 1955, pp.205-6
A contest entry
- a 'FOUND poem ~ free verse. "Gabriel's Dream" #60 by Lyndon.
2500 points, ended April 2, 2008, 11 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Best free verse for an anthology: OVWA Winklings # 182 by Lyndon.
2050 points, ended July 29, 39 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
1 - 9 of 9
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congradulations on all the shiny trophies
this is stunning
I breathed him through my skin,
inhaled him as we slept.
He seemed to fill himself with me.
This morning his face glistened with tears
but he refused to tell me why.
the ods themselves must indeed be pleased
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Wow, that is gorgeous. You have presented it in sensitive free verse, and the anguish of Hadrian is very moving. We are so lucky to have novelists who write such great poetry in their books. Congratulations for your gold.
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Thank you, judges, for the gold trophy. I am truly thrilled to bits. Just encourages me to go on trying.
crystaldust joy
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A true poetic lament
This has to be a fine poem!
Lineation ~ nothing left to be desired. Verse paragraphs are superbly rendered. Punctuation is well-handled. You begin each line strongly and end each line with psychological and aesthetic deftness.
Thank you poet, for this beautiful 'found' poem.
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Poignant tale, encompassing so much in relatively few words. Intense with descriptions. I was especially touched with "ashes still warm from an offering and a lock of his hair." The ending reminds me of a quote from "Man's Search for Meaning" by Viktor Frankl, along the line that "We can bear almost any 'what' if we only have a 'why'." Last stanza bears the aching of unsanswered "why?"
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This may be my FAV!
Thankyou for sharing this author with us. This may be
my FAV so far! I really delighted in this poem,
I will put Marguerite Yourcenar on my must read list,
which is way too long! I thought you wrote this
brillantly! very clean, smooth, and flowing!
way to go poetess, well done!
ears2hearyou
Kathleen/Seattle.
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This author thinks in poetry. I am moved with the passion and grief expressed within these lines with such ardour. We would not normally speak in her fashion in these times, but I'm reminded of mythology in her style, where everything is exaggerated feeling and power.
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A profound write, filled with emotions. Good luck in the contest.
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Hi Mum. A beautiful write is this 'found' poem. Deep expression of emotion. A sad lament of loss. Good imagery, flow and tone. Lovely metaphor. Nice rhythm. Good word choice and assonance, nice alliteration. Well penned and much enjoyed. Best wishes in the contest.
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