There is a familiar smell of decay
sleeping in my nostrils,
nesting in the follicles,
Tauntingly Comfortable.
I try to ignore
the sickening reality
that it is me,
Rotting,
From the Inside out.
Yet I can taste it,
the staleness on my breathe
with a bleak aftertaste,
leaving a longing
for lost savours
And my hollow eyes
Show a rotten core,
Putrefied
and Unrecognisable,
Under a mould of loneliness.
So I hold my breath,
sealing a tiring cycle.
Scared that others will see
this corpse that is me.
Author notes
This is a large section of my poetry and life that remains mainly hidden, i guess i was having a moment when this bit of me was stonger than all the parts trying to hide it.
In a list
A contest entry
- Eating Disorders and Depression by BarbedWireButterfly.
900 points, ended July 16, 2008, 35 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 5 of 5
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Very Dark Write
This is a dark write yes. Take this advice do not and I repeat do not cencor yourself. Poetry is art, Art should have no restraint or boudries you have to write what you feel what your senses sense. Even if it means hanging off the clif by your finger nails so if you are dark that day write dark, if you feel silly write silly and funny things, if you are meloncolly write. Just let the words flow I read some where when you write poetry you are using a inner voice the writing is not always about you come up with charactes and use them to write that way you shift the readers focus.
So yes this is a great write because it is honest.
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Nice dark, sad poem!
Wel;l done! The metaphor of "putrid" runs well throughout this little poem! You did a fine job developing your story and subject here. The title fits just fine and the last line "is a killer!" lol! Seriously, I like this poem even if it is dark and sad! Good work -- keep it up -- things will get better!
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Powerful imagery. Nice flow to this piece. I liked it all (even though I am not quite sure what a "mould" of loneliness is). Great poem.
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This write held my attention the whole way through. It spoke well of the topic without saying it directly which I hadn't seen done. I really liked this write. Thank you for entering and good luck in the contest.
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Alsome
And my hollow eyes
Show a rotten core,
Putrefied
and Unrecognisable,
Under a mould of loneliness.
So I hold my breath,
sealing a tiring cycle.
Scared that others will see
this corpse that is me.
Write this is u well described what you are feeling. You did a wonderful job with this poem. great job keep da ink flowin with this poem. Way to go bravo.
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