Year after year and time after time I denied it.
Walking through life a fractured piece of who I was.
Challenged by the image of a mother bleeding and crying,
wondering why she thought she had to leave us.
Alone, that is how I feel everyday of my life.
Trapped inside a wounded shell of loneliness and despair.
Hopeful thoughts around me, laughter and smiles.
I want to be there for them, but the demons keep me here.
Pills and talking about feelings and fears,
always feels like a huge waste of time.
Let me escape this cascade of fear and hate,
the keeps me in restraints.
Crawl into bed, leave me alone,
let me die inside myself.
I love you all but am loveless to me,
your lives would be better off.
In a list
A contest entry
- Therapy by Dienush.
600 points, ended April 6, 2008, 16 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 6 of 6
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"but the demons keep me there" is your best line. Depression does feel like a hoard of demons pinning us down. If only the past would go away and let us begin again. Solid poem.
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sad
let me die inside myself.
I love you all but am loveless to me,
your lives would be better off. THESE LINES ARE STUNNINGLY STRONG....i hope things work out
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It's very melancholy.When I read it,I felt the pain,the sadness.It is about depression,but not written in dark kinda thing like cutting,emo.I love reading it.It's not heavy.It's like you are tired of fighting it,but still have a small shine of hope in you to be with 'them' meaning family and friends.
I dont know if my interpretation is correct/make sense,but that's my thoughts regarding the poem.
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thank you for your comments, you hit the nail on the head here. My mother has suffered from depression most of her life and I believe that my life is spent trying to fight this disease to keep myself around and make my daughters life better then mine was growing up. I do have that slight glimmer of hope in there but sometimes it is very hard to see.
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owh..I so sorry to hear that..don't worry,have strong faith in hope.Is good you are creating a better world for your daughters.I wish you the best of luck,and sometimes you do get ecplises but dont ever give up. :-)
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Oh this has such a sad touch to it and your words just held a deep and painful image within.its deep and meaningful and captures alot well done auntie
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