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The confessions of a poet gone mad

Sketch me something
in my over active imagination.

Paint me of canvas of a beautiful life
I am something you don't understand,
so you want to open me up,
and pull apart the puzzle I've worked
years on putting together.
This isn't a facade I'm telling you!!
This is the real me.
Prescribe me something to stop
the voices in my head, that keep
me company when the world becomes
cruel and unusual punishment.
Life isn't lollipops and unicorns anymore;
It's a harsh reality, and the biting
cold is making me a callous
bumbling idiot.
The eloquent words that I used
to use; the beauty that danced
off my tongue is now replaced
with grimey third world trash
that even the most hardened criminal
would wince at.
I've thought about jumping off a cliff...
no it's not a hobby...
No you blithering idiot
God, I hate that your life is so perfect,
I'm talking s.u.i.c.i.d.e
such a dirty word I know...
But it's the only way out.
I've cried a river, built a bridge
and now I'm contemplating on the edge.
Insanity is a must these days you know...
Ugh. I look like shit today, and you standing
there with your perfect figure and your perfect
smile - God you make me sick!!!!
Scribble scribble scribble is all I hear...
yeah, well maybe your life isn't perfect either.
Meandering thoughts of how I want to kill you
entertain me!
Paint me a picture of how my life is suppose to be.

I want YOU to tell me, because honestly

I've given up.

I never thought I was an artist;

but is it sick that I've become

the Michaelangelo,

the Rembrant of twisted,

left wing psychotic thinking?

Put me in the crazy house, and pump me full of pills

because you'll never understand how I truly feel.

" How does this make you feel"

" What ways can we make this better"

fuck, I'm an actress in my own god damn life!

I know all the lines, and I've got them perfectly

rehearsed.

I'm the ultimate mastermind in the game of

chess I call my life.

I'm the champion of lies and deceit

only so I can live a normal life.

So, what's your excuse?

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Comments

1 - 13 of 13

  • pinkheart17
    June 7

    Edit | Reply
    omg wow, ery powerful. the emotions are very direct nothing is hidden from the reader, hopefully you'll have some happy times along with some of these bad times

  • Sound of Madness
    May 16

    Edit | Reply
    Oh wow! This is amazing! You expressed the type of things that I'd love to say in this poem. I'm blown away.


  • x-tears-x
    May 4

    Edit | Reply
    Wow. That is actually incredible. It makes me think so much and I can relate to it so much...wowowowowow. I love your work so much.


  • Sprite silver member
    March 30

    Edit | Reply
    "I'm an actress in my own God damn life!" That says a lot. I know the way one tries to hide form others because we think the real us will repulse. Self-hatred can make us resent anyone who seems to be perfect to us. That's another good point. Suicidal ideation is the road to actualization. Careful, girl, or you will fall in. This is a very thought-provoking poem!

    ~Joyce


  • Clairie
    March 21

    Edit | Reply

    EXCELLENT

    Oh it's great. One of the best I've ever read. So deep and so powerful. I liked this piece, it's excellent (:


  • B Tha Revolution silver member
    March 15

    Edit | Reply

    Deep & Powerful

    Really liked this piece out, I can realate to this on many levels,

    "Paint me a picture of how my life is suppose to be.

    I want YOU to tell me, because honestly

    I've given up."

    These lines really hit home with me, because I been going through this thing lately where people are telling who I should and what my life should look like, yet they never ask my opinion on what I think my life should look like. This is truly a brilliant poem in my opinion.

    Excellent work!


    • I must scream gold member
      March 15
      Edit | Reply
      Isn't that irritating!! You should know what your life is suppose to be! because it's your life. I hope that you find what you're looking for friend.

  • Fritz O skennick silver member
    March 12

    Edit | Reply

    Powerful!!!

    Loved this piece...
    Deep & dark...
    Can totally relate to a lot of your words here.
    Well penned, Well said, Well done!!!


  • kitty23
    March 8

    Edit | Reply
    omg i could barely take my eyes off the screen i have never read something more interiging(how ever you spell that word, lol)

    your writing is so powerful and every word i read made it more and more intense

    i love it

    every word got me hooked!!


  • fierra
    March 8

    Edit | Reply
    'Life isn't lollipops and unicorns anymore;
    It's a harsh reality'.This line is quite strong,like telling your sister to grow up.

    whoa! it was hard trying to keep up with the train of thoughts in this piece,but in the end,I pull it off.I understand it.i feel like this piece is genuine.I could read the complication of the persona's life,like i'm inside his/her head.well done!!

  • mmook
    March 8
    Edit | Reply
    excellence.... well done! well express! thanks for sharing... good luck


  • artis gold member
    March 8

    Edit | Reply

    start off by simply playing dead, death itself is overrated,

    let your curtain call be many years past the reaching of the audiences you have yet to touch, lose no sleep over works that fail you, they are like interrupted dreams, and only need a little rest to bring them back ever stronger, scratch perfection from your life, mar its pristine surface with a bic pen, it does not really exist, we can only hope to render it in such a way as to fool the beholders around us. I have seen enough resemblance to perfection in this work to fill volumes, it is a jagged bit of your life, ripped free and laid raw for all to learn from. What more can you ask??? ~~Artis

1 - 13 of 13