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Real Happiness

Missing image

When I saw my life with appreciation
the intent to embrace
what lay within my grasp

it was then
that I smiled

never wanting what I did not have;

for I had it all
in children's whispers
and sheltered grace
above my head
and in my heart.

I can breathe
and see sunshine and roses
the growth of souls
who bear my blood and bone

it's everything ~ Absolute...


                      and I am whole...

A contest entry

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Comments


  • bird at rose
    May 6, 2008

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    This poem really reminded me of my family and who all should be in certain parts especially

    Wow, it bugs me why the judge had a hard time getting the connection to his/her contest in this one. Your piece makes perfect sense and fit to me. Interesting the way you begin in your first line about that it may take us a while to reach that point of perspective, but there needs to be effort accordingly, progressing from a certain point of view. Doesn't just come automatically by yourself. You write so beautifully, and this poem made me sigh happily. I think it is such a way to put it within imagery, bringing out you're not trying to reach all over to pack everything you can in, which you can't and it falls out in a way... So, maskingly, it sketches a grin, yet if you look close, it's fake. Love the clearness that is so natural here and also how you emphasize there was darkness so to speak until now, like a long-lasting light.

    "for I had it all" is not complicated in wording, what it should be in life too, though so true and powerful right after you okayed limits. The descriptions underneath that, well I don't really want to say that because you spoke your details so easily personally, it did not sound like a report of your life. How could you do so anyway if you feel enjoyment? I notice simplicity like you're watching slowly with a distant smile the crowd may not see, and thankfulness. Appreciate, "and in my heart," it makes me want to say yay you said it, because your poetry reflects a lot. Neat wrapping that you do not have to look up to your ceiling to be loving lol, though a place to live is important too.

    The last line of the fourth stanza is penned so brightly, inspecting family and bonded friendship to help carry heavy emotions for work together... that is all known, but your phrasing makes it wonderful.

    This has basis of true happiness for me as well, glad to see someone else of the like looking to it too. Kudos!
    PIA-K


  • Charity Ann
    March 14, 2008

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    This is the real key to personal joy...contentment. This is what you've written about so cleverly. I like the line, "When I saw my life with appreciation the intent to embrace what lay within my grasp, it was then that I smiled." Thanks for sharing. I really enjoyed this one.

  • Lucille
    March 8, 2008

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    I must agree with xBlackRainbowCharx the words are tender. this makes it flow better with the italic letters. not bashing the poem or anything I must ask how this defines happiness over defining absolutity? I do think it is a lovely poem though


  • x-Black-Butterfly-x gold member
    March 7, 2008

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    oh this iiful it made me sigh. the way your words are so tender and caring with such depth and truth well done mommy