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Ritual Remembrances (Pt 2)

The pull to invite the red smear marriage
then the pushing is granted safe passage;
morbid decay cortex cells corrode
headless horseman pulls an empty carriage.

Sacrificial layers stream stacked consciousness
textured depth to touch tonal waves of bliss;
mesmirizing embrace sweet sensory overload
fading, fleeting, chasing everafter her kiss.

Frosted pale vision beneath anguished sky
streamlined thoughts glide easily in a sigh;
fountains of youth pour reflections overflowed
tethered to forgotten smiles gone awry.


Author notes

... Intravenous drug abuse memories. The first line is the drawing up of blood to mix with the drug, the second line is the pushing in.

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Comments

1 - 6 of 6

  • Blooming Poet
    March 18, 2008

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    wow. this is powerful. I really like these lines:

    Frosted pale vision beneath anguished sky
    streamlined thoughts glide easily in a sigh;
    fountains of youth pour reflections overflowed
    tethered to forgotten smiles gone awry


  • Metaphorist
    March 13, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Thanks for the author's notes. I didn't think it was about drugs. Great use of alliteration for sure!


  • Tamera
    March 8, 2008

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    extensive vocabulary and amazing ability to create unusual images, far from the mundane or stereotypical.


  • vici377
    March 8, 2008

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    wow

    amazing..your metaphors, imagery and flow are phenomenol..dark and pain-filled..the intense writes are always my favorites..thanx so much for sharing..and CONGRATS on the bronze..blessings and namaste..


  • Sarah957
    March 8, 2008

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    You make doing this drug sound pretty surreal. I have never tried anything like that so I can only go on what people like you say about it.

    Sacrificial layers stream stacked consciousness
    textured depth to touch tonal waves of bliss;
    mesmirizing embrace sweet sensory overload
    fading, fleeting, chasing everafter her kiss.

    I am imagining it now, you really did write with an impact. I loved the line about the headless horseman too!


  • Aesthete2000 gold member
    March 7, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Layers and layers
    of "tonal waves"
    giving an intense glimpse
    of a "mesmerizing" experience.
    Your writing definitely
    delivers with an impact!!!!

1 - 6 of 6