the things we don't say...

there are things we don't say... things that boil benieth the surface... things that make your skin crawl... the kinda shit you wanna scream until you feel human again... the shit noone will ever hear... you know its there they know its there he, she, it knows its there...but they won't hear it... noone will... you keep it  in a locked steel box that has things likeWARNING PRIVATE CAUTION and BEWARE written accrosed it... you keep this box deep in your heart... and the more you don't say the more it weighs... the more it weighs the worse you feel about having the steel box in the first place... if feelings weren't an issue... if hearts didn't break... and if love never failed to be returned... there'd be no use for locks and steel boxes... we'd all be floating in a sea of peace... a huge body of cool calming waters that take you places you can never go with that box... why? because with this steel box weighing us down as it does... we sink... and the only thing that can bring your ass back up for that breath of fresh air is you... opening your mouth... to say the things that you've kept a secret... but you won't do this because after the first time you did it... yes... your remembering now... the first time you took that leap of faith in hoping that you weren't alone in this world... hoping that you had someone that felt for you the way you did them... you felt it again didn't you? you are now possibly expieriencing your stomach turn and maybe you're a little light headed... your mouth may be hanging open and the mouse you have held firmly in your hand has probibly become damp from the sweat pouring from your palms... yes... my dear, dear friend... if this is so... and i'm hittin the spot just right.... i... like to call it a heart break... and this is exactially why you won't open that monsterous box in the dark damp corner in your heart... fear... noone's ready to take whats comming at them when they open that box... NOONE!!!... so we sink... like pebbles in the ocean...streight to the bottom... no stops... no breaks... no way in hell you'll open that box... i'd be willing to bet you'd rather drown than deal with the agonizing pain of feeling that heart ache... that torture... that weakening ring in your ears that makes your knees buckle and tear ducts give way... the ring that sends that heat flash up your spine and forces your teeth together in that grinding motion... its either that... or life at the bottom... no air to breath but still you keep kicking... you'll find ways to reach the surface of the water for moments at a time... we all do... but you can't stay there... because when your alone in your room... lying in bed... when you roll over to feel that cold side where you think they should be... when their not there... thats when you'll sink again... thats when you'll add to your box... the shit you SHOULD say... the shit you WANT to say... the shit you'll NEVER say... and thats the way it is ladys and gentlemen... thats all there is to it... nothing more... nothing less... good night...