You turn the globe into a map
of my albino eyes, and
as I stare out into the world I cannot see
but ash,
coloring the sky a gray
holocaust.
*
We dwell alone amidst our roving memories
as the snow softens our icy feathers;
this year we’re not going down south
but we'll brave frozen tongues –
for it is the test of a poet to dream
in melted language of spring,
while winter wanes wisdom.
This winter burst into color,
fiercely red; tinged with deceptively cherry
remnants of our limbs, collarbones,
hearts.
I coughed up your blood in the
roadside snow,
threw your trace
out the window.
*
This is strength,
you say, for
when all words fail,
hands remain.
*
Suddenly, my dreams turn fiery,
emblazoned with your touch
as I am left screaming
in the backdrop;
I clutch on to edges of your lips and
tug on your eyelashes, dangle
from your every vowel
and throbbing throat
while I roast on a pyre,
sticks and stones
of our self-proclaimed
apocalypse.
Nay, this is not witchcraft -
but it’s worth burning
for.
Author notes
A couple of parts, I am still working on fixing...
And the TITLE! GAH! I need a new title >.<
A contest entry
- Best Poem You Have Ever Written by Cherokee.
300 points, ended July 31, 2008, 36 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
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Lots of gorgeous imagery, there's quite a feeling of surrealism here. The words you choose to use are dreamy and light, even in the dark parts. My favorite line is "This is strength, you say, for when all words fail, hands remain." It's a nice little message thrown in there. Overall I liked this a lot
-cassidy
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Thank you so much! I really appreciate your feedback
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hm the title does seem a bit off to the poem but eh sometimes i do that and still find a way to keep it simple
i think there were parts that definatly signify your talent and then towards the end it got a bit lost but you said your still working on it so for sure im sure when your done it'll be great
thanx for sharing dear
♥
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Thank you for the suggestions! Hm, I did try to change the title..not sure if this one is any better.
Also, the end was supposed to be very different from the other stanzas, if thats what you mean...the effect was intended I suppose . I'll see what else I can do
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