Ditch the ads, upload images and much more - upgrade today from 5.95/month!
Read • Contests • Groups • Learn • Forums • Store • Help
 

space-hopper

perfectly irregular sometimes
or so it seems. Certain
looks from an angle perhaps
lost and found, as I let
you etch

forgetting for a moment
inherited collections; re
learned impulses
lag behind
attitude

inside lines meaning just
now was yesterday's

thrown shapes. Shadows
hurried beyond life, cycles
enveloped with clues, ephemeral

glimpses of what will be
around the corner. Disorder
pointed out in bubble-like
suggestions of tomorrow.

A contest entry

tell me exactly what you think; no holds barred!

    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
    • Line numbers  • Invite them to read
    : no Cost: 0 free left 0 points, You have (?)

Comments

1 - 11 of 11

  • 2lullabyhaven
    April 21, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    Thanks for your entry. This is a somewhat subtle poem for me to some degreelol


  • Pamela A Lamppa silver member
    April 2, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Very clever. I did like this very much. Congratulations on a well deserved gold. Excellent. ~Pamela


  • Sandygram
    April 2, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Congratulations on winning the Gold. A delight to read!! A lovely poem.

    Take care,
    Sandy


  • alaskanamber
    March 7, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Studying womens lit, there are so many female based cartoons. The bubbles that we normally associate with comedy and satire instead contain inspiration for the next generation of women. The whole point of my intro is that I really love the last stanza,

    "glimpses of what will be
    around the corner. Disorder
    pointed out in bubble-like
    suggestions of tomorrow."

    This could be the thesis for the book "Wonder Women" by Lillian Robinson. If you ever want to know about feminism and super heroes it's fascinating and ties directly to your acrostic.

    Thanks for entering poet and good luck.


    • polly filla
      March 7, 2008
      Edit | Reply
      excellent! I didn't realise those connections; thanks, I'll enjoy finding out!

      I'm interested in where writing comes from, gender-wise...don't know anything about it, but awareness (of being a woman) strikes me while I immerse myself in writing, both reading and producing

      so glad you noted satire and comedy in your review; I feel honoured!


  • corrughadh
    March 6, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    well written . etremeley.


  • Anguas-Confusion gold member
    March 6, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Wow.. this is really well done, a great extension of your name as well. Well done I really like this one. Best of luck in the contest. xxx

  • Suzanne Dia
    March 6, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    outline? Is this just the beginning or am I missing a rule from the contest.

    Ok, that out of the way

    this may be one of my favourites by you so far.

    I like the cosmic suggestion combined with some imagery that I don't normally see, and I really like that this has a personal touch to it. It feels like YOU ..if that makes sense.

    I have no crits



    • polly filla
      March 6, 2008
      Edit | Reply
      always a pleasure to hear your praise, 'Dia

      thanks!

      altho' I'm itching to put a comma in after 'sometimes', my (dumbfounded) sense of properness disallows it

1 - 11 of 11