I am the fallen angel
I am the brightest star
I am the bringer of light
I whispered in Eve's ear.
I stood before HIM in the halls.
I argued for the body of Moses.
I tested the GOD/MAN in the desert.
I have lived and died in the heart of every man.
I stand before the cosmos, sword in hand.
In greatest pride, legions at my command.
The time has come for the great war of man
The time has come to finish YHVH’s plan.
I am weary, my strength robbed, final days.
But I have lived in my prideful ways.
I have chosen, I have tested man's strength
I have walked to and fro, to last length.
Predator, I am the lion who has eaten.
I am God of this world, not yet beaten.
I see your weakness, know your rotted flesh
My time has come to an end, refreshed.
Man knows lowly angel, the demon side.
I swear, you'll never know the man inside.
I AM LUCIFER, hear my final roar!
Author notes
Legends and myths fade into time and obscurity. This one seems to be with us today. In my pride and arrogance I thought I could tackle this one. It's a unique view that I wanted to try.
A contest entry
- [LearnersINC ONLY] by garbait.
1500 points, ended March 22, 2008, 5 entries
Silver trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Mythology, (With a Twist!) Contest and Creative Writing Workshop by kareneisenlord.
900 points, ended March 16, 2008, 39 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Avant-Garde As Possible by Mr Id.
400 points, ended November 11, 2008, 10 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Criticize freely, I need input to improve
Comments
1 - 10 of 10
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Some interesting ideas here, though it isn't very avant-garde.
Nice work though
Good luck in contest -
congrats on the awards again,
you write some fabulous poetry! where do you get your inspiration from? you have a great talent for writing some intense poetry! i look forward to reading more!
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Congrats on all the shinys!
Very nicely done, both powerful and intense. I love the direction you took with this, tho a different title would have given this a surprise ending IMO as it could be read several ways. A wonderfully penned piece, congrats on the well earned trophy's
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Thanks Lady
For being a good fan. You know I'm not in your league. So kudos from you means a lot. Thank you, for giving the wolfman a happy grin. -
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Happy to do so, I like reading your poetry, keep penning
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wow. thats all i can say. this is amazing.
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I asked all of you for mythology with a twist, and you really socked it to me! I was very impressed by all of your entries, and many of you came up with some really unique and creative material with a different way of applying and perceiving mythology. It was enjoyable reading and I learned a lot from reading all of your fabulous writes. Because there was such an abundance of excellent entries in this contest, it was difficult to decide which ones would be the final winners. I apologize for taking so long to judge. Ultimately, I went with the material that impressed me and stuck with me the most. What had the greatest influence, insight, oversight, ambience and applied the myth/story in a thought-provoking and interesting way. The entries that were still playing through my mind and echoing with fond recollection, long after first reading them, are the ones that I finally decided upon as the winners. Objectivity in judging this contest was not my goal, but how each one of you subjectively influenced and moved me through your write. I re-read all of your writes again before my final judgment and relished it thoroughly. You are all gifted with incredible minds and talent. I wished that I could give more than one trophy in each category because certainly there was more than one that deserved it. All of you deserved an honorable mention, at the very least, and I wished I could do this and more. After the winners, the list is not in order of my favorites but most are in the chronological order as they were entered into the contest. I was glad to comment personally on each one of you. “Heading Towards Hope” - won the gold for me, because it took an uncommon theme in western mythology, deriving the story from eastern mythology, namely Hinduism. The interpretation of this, my favorite Hindu Deity, Ganesh, blew me away, and provided a step forward in my consciousness. I was awed by the profoundness, beauty and humility of this write. While many of your stories moved me deeply, this one actually shifted my consciousness. It contained both meaningful, inspirational and unique applications, written in a purity and sweetness of the heart and soul that is reflected in the words of the poet who wrote it. Gifts of the Faery, Part II I awarded Gifts of the Faery, Part II because it reached deep into my sense of profound honor and respect for Nature and all of Creation. Not only did it express stunning wisdom, but it also reflected an eloquent poetic style of it’s own. It is filled with ancient knowledge and powers that are for the Light and bringing humanity to a higher level of hope for the ultimate transformation of humankind and our Earth Mother! Lemuria's Sacred Contract - Video Slam Not only is this a beautifully written poem but it struck a chord that resonates far within the innermost essence of my being for I have always felt a special connection to Lemuria and long to be reunited with her. This is my hope for all of humanity, for “Lemuria” or the lost continent of Mu, (the motherland), is analogous with Paradise of earth. She was the original motherland of Atlantis and Egypt. They were her colonies. Lemuria sank beneath the ocean in the world‘s last great worldwide cataclysm. Mu existed in the Pacific ocean, and the Pacific islands, Easter Island and the Hawaiian Islands, are all remnants of her. This was over 20,000 years ago. Many believe that she will rise again, at least in the collective heart and soul of all humanity. This poem described my feelings in a way that I could not do much better myself - a twin reflection of my sentiments and my hope for us all of us! The Honorable mentions - I will talk about a few of them. Since I commented on all of your entries, you already know how I reacted to your work, but here are a few of the HM’s that I want to give further “honorable mention to“. I wish that I could do so for all of them, but these stood out the most in my mind. “Kalpa ” won an honorable mention because it reflected an overview of the Cosmos on a grand and astronomical scale. Not only was it eloquently written, but it impressed me with the deeper wisdom and perspective that was reflected therein, by giving one of the most developed and accurate views of the creation of the universe(s) and the dissolution that occurs over and over. It is the Hindu creation myth, that more and more, fits into the most advanced theories of physics and astronomy, (and the Vedic people came to this conclusion thousands of years ago, through spiritual practices!) Orphee's Heartstrings - expressed the pain and suffering of Orpheus so well. wow how in the world did i come up with this??? Very clever imagery and it was refreshingly spontaneous. Sacrifice with Creation - The ancient myth of a god sacrificing himself for the benefit of humanity carried forward to humanity helping humanity! Gasping - Had beautiful imagery and it reflected the tragic fate of both Narcissus and Echo in such a haunting way Lost Messiah - struck a chord with me, because it bravely stated how the most important messages of Jesus have been lost, to love ourselves and one another. I think Jesus is quoted to have said, “…love your neighbor as yourself,” among many other references to love. Another one is, “…love the Lord your God with all your heart…” Lucifer’s Sword - was another really courageous write in that it gave the perspective of the necessity of evil and the role of opposites. Untitled - was fresh and different. I was hoping that someone would write something based on Chinese legend and mythology. It is beautiful, rich, varied and ancient. This was a good job at tackling this creation myth. Poisoned Prophesies - impressed me because it expressed the dilemma of a seer. ..With a flying centaur... An exciting and enchanting poem about a mythological creature with wings taking one everywhere and anywhere in the Universe. The Reflection Looks Back - Was a wonderful interpretation of the Narcissus Myth. Star Garden - Thought-provoking with a lovely play on words. Nyquil Dreams - Because who is to say what is the true reality? "Plus DOCS changent..." - Another great play and twist on the age-old Cinderella story, told from the view point of the Fairy God Mother. Very clever and fun! Rick Rubens, Prometheus - I liked this one because it was clever and portrays modern day fire-givers. I could go on and on - and I wish that I could recap all of the entries which I have read over and relished. You were all great and like I said, you all deserved a trophy; every one of you! Thank you for putting all of your creative minds here in the contest for me to savor. All of you is exquisitely and uniquely talented. Keep writing and thinking because not only are you people good poets, many of you are amazing philosophers as well. That means, that you are seekers of the truth. That is what a philosopher does. Blessings!
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It does make one think of the necessity of Lucifer in the grand scheme of things; the creation of opposites. Whether of not he truly exists or is a creation in the minds of humanity's collective consciousness - an archtype of "evil" so to speak, you are right, Lucifer is very real and exists in the hearts of humanity.
All that you refer to Lucifer as, is true; the fallen angel and the bright (fallen) star that was a bringer of light. Ironically, Lucifer probably plays a big part in bringing light to humanity. for to know light, one must know it's opposite, darkness. When Lucifer fell from grace, a void of darkness was created; one that we must all pass through to reach the light. Was Lucifer the ultimate test for this? Lucifer certainly knows humanity's dark side more than any other. In a way, that does make him the bringer of light, doesn't it. It is an interesting way of looking at it.
This was a very intriguing subject that you took on here, and a deep one. It is very reflective and meaningful. Thank you for this and it was very courageous of you to go where many dare not to.
Best wishes in the contest! -
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Thank you
I thought it might have been a dangerous pick. But, I like to push buttons and test boundaries. That was a very insightful comment. You looked underneath the surface and saw some depth to it. Thank you, for the opportuntiy to present it.
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Well, I'm pleased with the first entry.
I'm looking forward to seeingwhat you come up with for your new poem entry!
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