lily/vine

Lily

Heart riped apart.
Changing,
Reforming,
My Soul.
Beyond insane.
No longer Me.
What to do?
She is now in charge.
Of everything.
Lost You.
Lost Myself.
Lost my Mind.
Don't have a heart.
Don't have a mind.
Desire.
A friend.
A lover.
A leader.
An escape.
A life.
Desire a Desire.
Miss you.
Miss nothing.
Can't miss.
Not allowed.
Confused.
Why?
What happened?
Don't know.
Can't know.
She won't let me know.
But she is me.
New me.
Sane me.
Crazy me.
Forever.
For Never.
Alone.
Together.
Locked up.
Lost the key.
She stole it.
A cliff.
On the Edge.
Didn't want to fall.
Didn't want to lose.
Consciousness.
You pushed.
She pushed.
I'm weak.
I fall.
Can't stop.
Can't hit ground.
No bottom.
No end.
No release.
No death.
But no life.
Only her.
Not me.
Her.
You.
Me.
Don't mix.
I love you.
She hates you.
You hate me.
Don't believe in her.
Lies.
Deceit.
Confusion.
I'm lost.
She's not.
Want.
A soul.
A life.
A voice.
A heart.
Want you.
Want love.
Head pounding.
Bad sign.
Too many pills.
Not enough strength.
She is strong.
She can handle it.
She doesn't need you.
I need you.
No.
I need  someone.
Doesn't have to be.
You.
Can't continue.
Without.
Giving up.
No choice.
I love you.
Goodbye.

Vine

You think I'm me?
You think I'm Lily?
Take a guess.
Maybe I am.
Maybe I'm not.
Pick one.
Did you pick right?
I'm not her.
I'm me.
Believe me yet?
Probably not.
Oh well.
I hate you.
I'm the new one.
The strong one.
I lack every element that makes her weak.
I possess every element she lacks to have strength.
I am trapped.
Do you think I want to be here?
The byproduct of one girl's fear and pain?
Overly sensitive.
Totally insensitive.
I can't be hurt.
She always is.
What are we supposed to do?
A fucked up life.
Too much death.
Not enough love.
Abandonment.
Abuse.
Rape.
Two abortions.
Couldn't handle it.
Was given me.
I can.
But why should I help?
Why should I be the Great Protector.
To guard against the pain.
Let her feel it.
A million times worse.
Makes me a million times stronger.
A great takeover.
Thank you.
You made it possible.
You and every other guy that fucked with her.
Heart.
Soul.
Mind.
And body.
You think she wanted that?
No attention.
Only sex.
Pleasuring you.
Doing as you say.
Sharing her.
Showing her off.
AN object.
Your possession.
Hurting her.
Mentally.
Did you care?
Would you stop?
(You created this)
Would you have left her?
Probably.
Not evil.
Choose evil.
Why not?
Too "good."
Too perfect.
(Not really)
Too innocent.
Too naive.
Too weak.
Not me.
The sadistic other half.
The one that's "in control."
Stable.
I am the new Lily.
No longer Lily.
I am Vine.
I am scorn and revenge.
I will not,
Can not,
Be stopped.
I will not end.
Or say.
Goodbye.