I'm still in the corner
turning another shade of blue
and nobody reaches
for that colour
anymore.
Lips collect dust
from a sometimes voice
crumbling with misuse and neglect...
Will I remain hushed
back here in an isolated room
with no bars
but not enough softness
to conceal the hurt...
Author notes
Prompt ~ Decaying Isolation
A contest entry
- A little lonely rainbow by x-Black-Butterfly-x.
300 points, ended March 19, 2008, 19 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
-
I don't want my sigh to be missed out on, not just sob; sides beautiful... accoustically
you broached the breadth of the topic
this sharply details feeling stuck but also in cut circles for resettling self between discouragement and depression from the beginning. your wording has me think of someone unable to be pushing themselves anymore or afraid of others, and never getting aid or crossing out theirs... without variety of appeal. the conclusion of the first stanza sets the full tone of the piece. poignantly artistic.
the middle one was loved by me. that disintegration of expression is so pensive. like one is woman not just musician. I feel my madness of chemical sensitivity when I come to touchiness of outside traits "crumbling with misuse and neglect..." with instigation to restart to something useful, (more) healing. It is heartbreaking to rot tattering Proverbs 18:1 in sorted out protectiveness 'One isolating himself will seek [his own] selfish longing; against all practical wisdom he will break forth.' that can feel crass without routes yet spanned prettier is in trying, alternatively sometimes.
no bland emphasis.
your last three lines solidifies the feeling of needing more than half solution.
title exquisitely summarizes, something in the exclamation mark isn't for being sunken but with assistance to then be assisting as this piece even generates reminders.
thank you for sharing can't just be hinted,
babies are my subject -
i think so many people will have been in this possission and felt these feeings a very sad piece


-
I think that we've all for sure have been in this place before..a very sad place to be.
You did wonderful on the prompt




