Beautiful in its rarity,
Fragile in its existence,
The Chance.
Infinite in its distance,
Warped in its period,
The Drive.
Restrained, in their birth,
Missing, in their demise,
The Words.
Doubts, in her mind,
Bliss, in her heart,
The Girl.
Inexistent, in his heart,
Invisible, in her eyes,
The Reason.
Author notes
Background:
Off she went away to a far far place for some official work. I followed, finding nothing better to do. She squeezed in a day for me, and off we went for a mighty long drive.
Been a while since that happened. This poem, is about that trip.
First stanza is about how fragile and rare the chance to make her blisfully happy was. I knew she'd be mighty surprised that I travelled so far for her, and I didn't wanna pass the chance.
Second stanza is about the the long drive we took, the distance so long and the time spent seemed too short.
Third stanza, now this is fun. Now she is the kind of person who won't be very expressive about anything at all nice she feels about me, about the stuff i do. So when she says something, you know for sure that those words have been measured, restrained and finally thrown out, and they'll be forever in my mind, never to die.. so 'Missing, in their demise'.
Fourth stanza, she wasn't totally comfortable with what was happening that day, but inside, she was happy that she could make me happy by spending that day with me.
Fifth, ah..that smile, those eyes,I was speechless, and there were so many unknown emotions creating a ruckus deep inside!
Sixth, I didn't really have to go on that trip. I wasn't even expecting her to turn up considering how hectic a schedule she had, but I just went.. no reason..whatsoever. Just to make her happy. She, thought there had to be a reason why i was being so good to her, but was unable to see any reason that made sense. So there.. The Reason
AP Forever!
Comments
1 - 5 of 5
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awesome poem...! the style of writing reminds me a bit of what i wrote a while back... awesome poem... not so sure about the person... dont ask me to explain.. il jus say 'no comments'...
LR!
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Wonderful, lovely to read, thanks for sharing Dumbkiwaniwinkydodo!
I think you wrote all of that out for yourself to relive the experience more than to explain the poem to us. Haha! 
So nice to have you back, even if for a brief moment. I miss you!
Love,
Your Nutty Fairymother
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Thanks for the comment! Oh yes, you're mighty right.. to relive the experience! So how would you rate my return on a literary scale? I mean ... is the poem good?
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Here's a critique, since you asked.
I think it's beautiful and only needs a few small changes to make it that much better.
Took out commas, you had it in some but not others.
Beautiful in its rarity,
Fragile in its existence,
The Chance.
Infinite in its distance,
Warped in its period,
The Drive.
Restrained in their birth,
Missing in their death,
The Words.
Awkwardness in her mind,
(or Uneasiness in her mind, - the words together seem redundant)
Blissful content in her heart,
The Moments.
This next stanza seems too wordy compared to the rest of it, I would try to shorten the first two lines and maybe take out "pretty" so it flows with the rest of the poem better, though I know you want to say her face is pretty just saying "the face" I think says a lot in itself.)
Armageddon of words in his mind,
Chaos of emotions in his heart,
The pretty face.
Inexistent in his heart,
Invisible in her eyes,
The Reason.
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Great! I'll work on the 'wordy' stanza... but pretty face...hmm...lets see how to put it.. Will let ya know when im done Thanks a ton 'featherlight flying in the sky looking over the world super duper nutty' fairymother
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