Like a decrepit house
my tears fall
bit by bit
slowly rotting my soul.
No one hears my cry.
Author notes
broken
A contest entry
- . by Aurora Ceres.
475 points, ended March 4, 2008, 9 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Short pieces - Prewrites Allowed. Bring the good stuff! by Amunet Wolfbane.
1000 points, ended April 1, 2008, 58 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
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This really is much stronger i think without that line. Very powerful now.
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The emotion is in this piece. I think you could do without the first line totally and this piece would have much more impact. Just a thought
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This was really good. You were under the word amount that was required though. But it was good. Thanks for entering and good luck.
~vampy~
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