The littlest Boy Is Peyton The older is Cooper
Group My mom Amanda My grandpa, and my Dad
Please no one use this pictures are of my sister and her family border 360 width 1280 height 1500 I warped her dress in the border
Look at you on your Wedding Day
all dressed up and looking pretty.
A precious moment to cherish
and a day to remember always
Especially when your little boy had to pee.
Author notes
This is my Sister Amanda on her wedding day.
I could not get the size to work right therefore the picture quality got messed up. I played with it over and over again, since yesterday.
Her photographer was:
http://www.cnbcreationsphotography.com/
The ring background came from flickr.com under wedding rings
***Several-Poems*** BG - Abuse/Depression
Rambling's
I feel unimportant sometimes like I don't even matter No one comes to visit me, sitting in this house all alone. I don't have a car anymore, so I can't go anywhere. I look back on my life it is a sad sad shame. All my dreams and loved ones seem to have disappeared. I feel like my family, doesn't know I exist. They don't even care to read, my poetry anymore. I do not have a job anymore, even if I did it wouldn't last. I do not take care of myself, seeming to be withering away. I even have everything I want, a husband and three kids. All my family does what they want, vacations, friends, and dates. Having nothing to talk about with them, when we do gather for meeting's. So what is wrong with me, why do I feel this way? I need out of this mess, I can't stand it no more. Sometimes I wish I could die, but my kid's pop into mind Sometimes I wish to run away, and never come back. I am to scared to do anything, for I afraid to piss people off. Sometimes I wish could take another drink, but I think I will have to pass. Most of the time I wish, I had never been abused.
blah blah stupid crap
I try to help you in so many ways, I have better idea's you say. You know how this makes me feel,I pour my heart out for you, try to make you not so blue. You are the only friend I have ever had, now things are going oh so wrong. You have helped me not be scared and alone, I am frightened and very sad now. I can't be alone and you know this to be true, I will not eat now because of this. My life I have bestowed upon you, thing's I have told no one else. You've helped me blossom, and become aware of who I am. You've made me feel special, and made me enjoy life. I try to help you out as best as I can, by not listening to me, you get yourself into more trouble. You tell me thing's didn't work out, choosing not to head my word, then your angry at me for this. This isn't fair you can't turn me away, throw me out like a piece of trash.
Separation Anxiety
Alone, I'm Alone Why do you leave me in the darkness, with no one to speak but my mind. It wanders, and I'm scared. Please come back I'm alone, all alone. When I leave you with the children to a Wedding, a place to get away, I'm overjoyed and excited, but alone I feel today, I need to return quick, for in a crowd I'm still alone.
Separation Anxiety abuse, drunkenness, loneliness, love and lose I've dealt with problems in a way that was very wrong now i am an emotional wreck I do not drink i do not receive the abuse i have people all around my children and family and friends love me, and those who left are long gone yet all these good things have happen i am still lonely i do not eat i do not sleep my children with me each and every day but when he goes to work i fade away. I want to be free i go places too be but when I'm gone i miss my immediate family so. when i return i wish i have not gone. wish i would have stayed i missed the dance with my granddad, my dad. But my hands shake and so nervous that i have to go back home I'm sick to my stomach, dehydrated, my hair falls out in clumps so big, separation anxiety is bad
A Night In The Woods
I snuck out of the house one evening as a child to go play in the woods. It was fun it was dark the nocturnal animals were out to play I was fascinated. The creek trickled down it's destined plight gurgling over each rock. The trees gently swayed in the cool brisk air but I was warmed by thoughts. To end the silence and the fun a helicopter swarmed over head I was scared they were looking for me. Then an ambulance and cars appeared in the field many men frantically ran about. The helicopter also landed on the field I could see it from the tree I had climbed. I then went deep into the woods panicking with fear that I was in trouble. No one ever came into those woods searching for me though I was wondering what was going on. I slept the night in the woods no one even noticed I was gone till morning came around. Then the search for me was on the hustling of leaves underfoot and calling of my name was profound. My dad was close but he never even saw me I was buried under a pile of leaves. Another night I couldn't bare I was scared to death and all alone so I came home that evening. Snuck back into my warm bed at least I'd get a few hours of sleep before all hell broke loose in the morning.
I never did get in trouble they were worried about me, I told them i had went out to go see the helicopter and fell asleep in the woods. I man had been stabbed in town that evening and the field by my house was the safest place to land
**Abuse of A Child I**
One April day, I regained my freedom from the abuse of boys and men. From the age of five I was abused savagely, for they touched me here, and they touched me there. They told me not to tell. I didn't know right from wrong, I was but a child. I thought this was they way things were supposed to be. Things went on from months and years. All the things a child should never endear. C'mon over and babysit. Me and my wife are going out a bit. I was awakened with a slide of a hand upon my tiny bosom, and one up under my dress. I didn't know right from wrong, I was but a child. I thought this was the way things were supposed to be. I went to school, in a new year. A health class teacher, told us what I thought was right was wrong all them years. I broke down and cried many, many tears. She said dear child whats the matter, I could not, would not tell her what I had endeared. School was over, I went home. I was so mad I got in a fight. I then went and sat on their steps, the wife came home and I told her what I had endeared. The look in her eyes was disbelieving. Many more years passed by. She still didn't believe me until, her daughters told her what they had endeared.
Bronze - Abuse of a Child II
In her mind she sometimes reverts, back to the past that deeply hurts. Creeping into her precious mind, like those hands underneath her skirt. In her ears, so many times, she has heard don't you tell or you will regret. In her ears, so many times, she has heard, don't you tell or we'll say you sucked our...In her ears, so many times, she has heard, don't you tell or your sisters will suffer too. No friends were made in school No emotions ever expressed. No fun she's ever had. Dirty filthy hands layed upon her breasts Dirty filthy ... forced within her mouth. Dirty filthy hands forced with in her...In fear of embarrassment In fear of life In fear of harm inflicted upon others Gentle breeze blows through her hair, reminding me that she's still here. Look forward now, you are alive. Look forward know, your past has died. They can not hurt you now, their secret has been told.
Bronze - The Rape
Dancing round in the bar, flirting with the guys. Beating them at games of pool, sometimes taking on a few. Music blaring in my ears, the room begins to spin. Next thing I know I'm in a car, going to a place I've never been. Throwing darts through the air, as I drink a few more beers. Then my shirt is ripped open, and three men begin the sin. I get thrown into the bed, my skirt ripped from my legs. Screaming no you can't do this, then there was a blow to the face. I wake up in this awful place, not knowing were I'm at. A smelly man on top of me, his breath reeks of dope. I find my skirt on the floor, and put pull it back on. My face is pounding very hard, my eye is swollen shut. There is blood dripping down my leg, and refuses to stop. I walk out of that awful place, trying to remember the way we came. I walk about a half a mile, and come upon a store. I take out a quarter from my purse, and dial my boyfriends number. He says stay where you are, I'll be there in a few. I can not do what he says, I need to get away. So I return to that lonesome road, cold and numb as can be. I jump into the ditch, each time a car passes by. He never found me on that night, I was to scared to be seen. I finally made it to his house, he was mad for I didn't wait. But in his arms all day long, he held me as I weeped.
Bronze - I am
Years of emotional and physical abuse I've thought my life to be worthless. Dwelling within my inner thoughts and wallowing in my pain. I have feared man and deemed myself unworthy of tenderness and affection. Pushing many away due to the skeptical turmoils of my own emotion's. I happened upon a man whilst at work he a bartender and I a cook. Needless to say he overwhelmingly stole my heart with kind words and caring voice. A struggle began within my self Am I deemed worthy of his love? Indeed I was he swept me off my feet showing me how life was supposed to be. But Jekyll and Hyde still remained within myself and yet the drinking took it's toll. I had become an alcoholic and he thought someone sent him to help me. He fought for our love unselfishly accepting the hurt I bestowed upon him. He stuck by my side through thick and thin he was my savior my knight and shining armor. Showing me that I am beautiful and a person he could love. A person worthy of tenderness and affection. A person worthy to bear his child. A person to spend the rest of his life with. A person worthy of living another day with out the tragic turmoils of life. That there is a light, at the end of a tunnel.
Gold - Hush Your Mouth
Do you know how bad it hurts, for someone to call you a whore, at the age of five. To be told that you will die, if you don't heed his command. To be told that your sisters, will suffer the consequences too. Do you know how it feels, to sit in silence most of our life wanting to speak but in fear to do so. You are a bitch, born and bred for sex, nothing more, nothing else, for you girls, are worthless cunts. You are a stupid idiots, girls have no brains just puss and tits, and hell you are not even beautiful, you look like a piece of shit. Your life is worthless, you are trailer trash, you'll never amount to anything, in this world. I may as well kill you here an now, but then who will give me head if I do that, so I think I'll keep you around. But do as I say or I'll embarrass you, I will tell every one what you have done. You will be the fool, and the loser, not me. Do as I say now, you worthless piece of miserable trash.
~~~~~
Tears streaming down my face, in fear for my life, I have to do as he says. In fear that he will tell all, that I am a whore is so embarrassing, and I had crept around in school. They always stare at me, I wonder do they know. Someone asks a question, deep down inside, I want to answer, but I can't, so now they call me a retard too. I got suspended from school, for not answering questions, or not doing a project, with an assigned partner, as well. I cried to myself every night, wishing I had friends, knowing this is not right. I hate those sons of bitches for torturing me, and this pain still lingers today.
~~~~
"You disgusting child hush your mouth, don't say or word or you'll be dead," as he tears my clothes from my body, then with hands he grabs my breasts. "I promise to hurt you and your family if I ever see you speaking to anyone, also telling everyone you sucked my dick, and that you enjoyed it very much." "You are a whore," he says and grabs my head, forcing me to the ground. "Get on your knees you filthy bitch and suck away before my balls split." "Emmm, you suck good just like your Mom, I fucked her to a while ago, I wish you could of saw that, you little cunt, you might of learned a few tips." "Do not say a word to any at all, for I might have to do this to your sisters to., Ohhh, the little one she looks fine, I bet she could suck dick better than you."
Author notes
http://www.graphicsarcade.com
Bronze trophy winner
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