dear world,
it's me.
today i couldn't stop shivering.
there is no more food left.
tomorrow will be better.
dear world,
it's me.
today it hurts to breathe.
i got some hard bread to eat
but it was green.
tomorrow will be better.
dear world,
it's me.
the food is gone again.
will i ever get something else to eat?
will anyone ever help me?
tomorrow will be better.
dear world,
it's me.
today the hunger stopped.
my village is missing food
and missing me.
today i am in heaven.
tomorrow will be better.
but why couldn't you help me today?
Author notes
http://www.sudan.net/graphic/news/famine/famine_lying.jpg
A contest entry
- Options by Ilma.
600 points, ended March 16, 2008, 13 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - i want to be you for a while. by Ryno.
575 points, ended March 8, 2008, 14 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - What makes you passionate? by TabbyCat.
900 points, ended March 24, 2008, 30 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 7 of 7
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I think this poem deserved more credit..It is a great way to look at life as getting better but in the end why quesiton Gods judgment? He is already helpng you live a better life in heaven!
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I really liked the idea behind this, particularly the repetition of 'dear world, it's me' and 'tomorrow will be better' as it shows the futile hope felt by people in bad situations and made the final stanza and especially the final line all the more poignant. However, the middle sections to each stanza were a little lacking in poetic devices I think.
Anyway, well done, good luck and thanks for entering =]
Hannah x -
I was recently convicted in this area and adopted a child through worldvision. All it costs me is $30 a month to make sure that this kid in Myanmar has food, water, clothing, education....what a difference just a dollar a day can make. I think people just don't realize how hard things are in the rest of the world. I wish more people would travel to those places and see those things. They might be more compassionate towards those less fortunate if they did.
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Sad...how in our country, we are addictted to fast foor, when so many people in the world have nothing to eat at all. Thank you for sharing this heartfelt write.
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I loved this write. The idea behind it is wonderful and I think the broken sheds of hope he/she continued ingniting is what made the ending of the poem all the more heartwrenching.
Could've used some stronger imagery, besides that, this is exactly what I am looking for. You pulled me in and demanded me to walk in the shoes of this person.
So sad
Thanks for the entry.
Ryan -
THIS IS SO STRONG AND BEAUTIFULLY SAD...such a reality check to the world...wake up and see today for tomorrow maybe too late...very nice...hoping more read this and get a clue...
Best to you!
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This poem is just... wow. This caught me off guard. The whole repeating of the letters with a different message every day.. each line was another anticipation.. and the end was stunning and so sad... You've portrayed such a personal issue with people around the world today, and it really touched the heart... Thanks for sharing.
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