We walk silently in the rain
Neither of us knowing what to say
I am starting to feel this pain
Lying, arguing, you betray me
You pull me to a stop
Looking at you I can no longer fake
My heart is about to drop
You take my hand as I start to shake
Looking down in dissapointment
I let go of you and your hand
Never looking back as clouds dissapear-
And the rain starts to clear
A contest entry
- Singin in the Rain by ForeverNightMusic.
500 points, ended April 10, 2008, 18 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What do you think?
Comments
-
I love this. You don't mess around and try to make me think. You get right to the point and I LOVE THAT. wonderful job.
xoxo
pixie -
Very good.
-
i like this one ... simple but to the point
thanks for entering love
good luck
morgan
-
betray-not betry.
I didn't exactly get where
it fits between the end of
stanza two and the start of stanza
three.
I liked the imagery though.
It felt like you could be walking
through the rain at this very second.
Good luck at the contest.
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