How can you turn away from me?
Why does my heart always get broken?
Why can't you just stop and see?
Is this rose just one last token?
You say goodbye and kiss my lips
You turn and walk away from me
You expect me not to go to fits
I begin to wonder who is she
How can I make you understand all this?
What more can I do to show you I'm the one?
It can't all end with just one kiss.
You brighten my day like a morning sun
You make me forget my woes my past
You took me to heaven so far so fast
If I must beg you I must I will
I don't have pride left to kill
Without your life, shall I wither and die?
Shall I have nothing to live for again?
without your love I break down and cry?
Shall I end my suffering with this pain?
Hold me close, Just once more to your chest
For old times sake please my love
I'll stick this knife into your breast
Twist it so, as you look above
Your eyes they question me and you try to speak
You fall to the floor as I stand there with you
"Why?" I hear come from your mouth as you creak
"It's really simple, it's because I don't have you"
Now as you lie dying bleeding to death
I think of our old times whispered breath
I begin to miss you already as you twitch on the floor
You calmly look up and call me a whore.
A contest entry
- Love Lost. Love To Hate; Hate To Love Poems by pillowjoe.
400 points, ended March 27, 2008, 12 entries
Silver trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 18 of 18
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Gruesome
Congratulations on the Silver. -
"You took me to heaven so far so fast"
you've got talent missy.
The ending was hilarious!
I love the fire in your writing. -
Very deep, it took me there. As if It were unfolding in front of me. I’m new at writing poetry but I hope I can write as well as that someday. the title was quite reavealing, but did not give the peice away. Good work
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Wow! Coming from a place such as this I can truly comprehend this piece in it's entirety. It is so hard to love and not have that love returned.....I liked the ending. It's hard to grasp that intensity if you have not felt it.....well defined and written here.
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you are so possesive ... love is a freedom to say "yes i do" or not
congrats for the trophy
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ah,imagination with its feet on the ground!, thats a rare rare thing I'm finding out 'round here...just loved the knife in the embrace & the twitch on the floor...after all the nonsense & crap i've waded thru here this morning this was something still had a bit of meat left on the bone & it was juicy juicy juicy...and the line "It's really simple, it's because I don't have you"...you nailed it there & there was no lie in it nor even the slightest hint of apology, Thank God!!...it could have been shorter, i say this not as detraction but just a heads up...i mean you definitly have it in you to give your reader no time to catch breath,just WHAM!WHAMWHAM!!
here's to hoping that happens in the future...you got sand,Doll,& you got shine...thank you thank you thank you!
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wow that was pretty amazing. I can't believe how it all turned out. how someone would be able to say that to another who cherishes them so. It is sad how things turn out tho, when love is once there, it can so easily be lost. As I always say...There is not a divorce in love, there is only...until DEATH does us part...I always tell my man this...and we both sit there and laugh...lol
Well thank you for your lovely contriubtion it was much appreciated.
Have a great day.
God Bless
~Only1love4ever -
One line blending perfectly with the next and the ending... was just as exquisitely penned. Great job here. Thank you for sharing this with me and best wishes in all of your endeavors. Keep that pen handy and ever ready for use dear poet.
♥ Touchof1der -
Wow! um, I really enjoyed how this read like a story yet flowed like poetry. Excellent metaphore and imagery.
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AMAZING!
i really enjoyed this. keep it up..=]
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all in one comment great work
Love the flow & narrative of the piece...
Very vulnerable, revealing & heartbreaking.
I feel your pain, I've lived your pain...
And absolutely excruciating that after everything you've been through and felt, the bastard gets the last word...
Another great write...
Wow, I really enjoyed reading this. I thought the twist at the end really made the poem. The last 4 lines were my favorite. Excellent write
Wow! This poem like really spoke to me! Also I love the next to last two lines "Now as you lie dying bleeding to death I think of our old times whispered breath" I love the way it sounds! You did great!
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Wow, I really enjoyed reading this. I thought the twist at the end really made the poem. The last 4 lines were my favorite. Excellent write.
XXCrimsonRaineX -
ah love, it twists us into crazy shapes on its palm and all we can ever do is scream in the pleasure and the pain of it all. a good poem.
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Wow! This poem like really spoke to me! Also I love the next to last two lines "Now as you lie dying bleeding to death I think of our old times whispered breath" I love the way it sounds! You did great!
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This is amazing. It made me cry for the girl.
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Great Emotion and awesomely worded good luck
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um....
I'd bet there's more then a few women out there who'd like to do this deed. A heavy written piece here. And sad.
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Wow!!! Deep & Dark!!!
Love the flow & narrative of the piece...
Very vulnerable, revealing & heartbreaking.
I feel your pain, I've lived your pain...
And absolutely excruciating that after everything you've been through and felt, the bastard gets the last word...
Another great write...
Well done!!!
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