There is no other pain like losing a mother,
like looking into her empty, motionless eyes;
she stares through me, I ask her, "What do you see?"
mommy, mommy, please don't leave me, not now!
I try to memorize every color in the iris of your eyes,
closing those lids for eternity, I almost disappear.
The screaming is gone, mommy still repeats in the air,
wrapping your arm around me, I try to mother myself.
I kiss your perfectly formed nose like you are my child,
I marvel at your tiny toes, your feet always in pain.
Imagining you finally walking is some small comfort,
but my heart singes grief over wanting to keep you here.
Your hair feels like silk, I brush it with my fingers,
I'm guilt trodden mommy, I heard your labored breath.
Why did I only return to slumber, I let you go and
I wonder if you are lost because this happened too fast.
They want to take you from me but I won't let them,
your lungs are holding the breath I forced into them.
I've wiped all the liquids from my silly efforts,
I could hear you laughing, telling me to stop.
I cannot let the site of you leave me, please God,
take that image of her blue face and arms from me.
At least I turned you pink with the life you gave me,
at least I told the fluid in your lungs to go to hell.
I hear them all in the other room, ticking away and,
I want to smash all the clocks in your house.
Tell me why time speeds faster than sound now?
My hands beat the floor, as they bruise into numbness.
Thirty-five years ago they covered your beautiful face,
they pronounced you dead, you said, "No I'm not."
Today I saw a man shake his head from side to side
and I sat on the floor watching him in slow motion.
My outer shell is wailing over it's own death but,
inside an eerie peace comes over me, I don't want it.
Is it you, God or angels, telling me it will be okay?
I look around the room, I think I can feel you.
Your teeth bare fragments of the Oreos we shared,
I remove them as if they were gold I must have.
I close your sweet lips and stroke your perfect skin,
you are so young looking mother, you didn't think so.
It's just you and me, I make them close the door,
these are our final moments, my words fail me.
I talk to you outwardly, futilly hoping you hear me,
Mommy; I'm waiting, I'm watching, I'm listening...
Author notes
Dedicated to my sweet mother Eva Lynn Nachazel who passed away unexpectedly on Feb 16th 2008, 10 days ago. I miss you so much mom!! This is only the beginning of the many poems I will write for you!
2) Write a poem about someone you've loved that you've lost, either to death, time, etc.
A contest entry
- ~Dead is the New Alive~ OPTIONS CONTEST by Figg.
450 points, ended March 19, 2008, 30 entries
Silver trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Recognizing Defeat by LaylaLace.
600 points, ended March 23, 2008, 29 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 16 of 16
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Firstly, I'm so sorry about the loss of your mother. I can't even imagine what that must have been like. This is a touching poem; I like the vulnerability throughout it. It really heightens the emotion. There are a few spelling mistakes that you might want to check over [lines 12 and 21] but overall, good poem! Good luck in the contest
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First let me say how very sorry I am for your loss.
I still have my Beautiful mom, but sadly I loss my Dad a few years ago.
I know your hurt.
Talk to your Mom, she'll be listening,
and watch for her smile in the sunset sky, You'll see her. That is what I believe, anyway.
I miss my Dad, and I know you miss your Mom, keep her near your heart and know that no one could ever take that away.
Your write to her is beyond beautiful.
Loveandblessings2u & yours always
Joyce
good luck in my contest. -
A little long for my taste... but i really enjoyed reading it... i loved the emotion...
Jack
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Ooooh..I am so sorry for your loss. The details of this poem will haunt me for sure. Thanks for the entry.
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I can't imagine losing my mother, though she drives me crazy once in a while. I think that I would just cave in if my mom passed away. Thansk for sharing this emotional write and good luck in the contest.
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This is beautiful and heartfelt. I felt like I was looking into a window, watching a very personal scene. Thank you for sharing this.
Good luck in the contest!
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this is a tearjerker. you've expressed yourself so very honestly right down to the Oreos. i'm so very sorry you lost your mom. your write gives the impression that you were very close... that is a wonderful gift
thank you for entering and good luck
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It's a beautiful dedication and tribute ~ You touched my heart even as a Mom too ~ I want to give you a hug
and hold you. I was crying a tear at the first stanza. Touching! ~
Thanks so much for entering my tribute ~ I do appreciate you sharing your work ~ & ~ remember your Mom is always with you!!! and you are always with her!!! Best of luck to you~ < another hug for you!
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Beautiful Memorial
Your poem reminded me of a phrase I read on a stranger's tombstone once in Pennsylvania:
"When this world claims your limbs, then you can truly dance!" Isn't that fitting? Excellent and moving poem. Aloha, friend!
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Oh my god! I am so sorry for your loss!!!! This is a powerful powerful poem and I enjoyed every single line. Any time you need your Mommy you talk to her...she'll hear you. If you need to cry, just cry...you'll feel better for it. thank you for entering my contest. If you need to talk or vent...I'm here
Rosita -
I am so sorry you lost your mother. I know in my heart your mother will be with you anytime that you need her. She is walking with God now. Your poem is beautiful, im sure she is proud of you
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the stanza about the clocks is very powerful. this is a very emotional poem. and well contained for something so emotional. great write. i'm sorry about your loss ( i know that sounds so cliche and bad, but i don't know you so i don't know what else to say, but i really mean it)
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This poems seriously just made me cry. It's so beautifully written, and so tragic, that it pained my heart to read it. Though it's a thing you must hear often, I am sorry for your loss. I have lost a great deal so close to my heart, and I have never found such an eloquent way to express it.
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Amazing
This is one of the saddest and heartfelt poems I have ever read
The words you havechosen tore my heart into peices
I feel that you have decribed a life time of love and compassion here. This is just beautiful.
Good luck in the contest.
Amazing write
Thank you for sharing
I felt your pain and longing for her
in every word
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a powerful emotional write
so sad to hear of your loss.this is a wonderful ttibute to your mum and a way for you to release some of your pain.
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my god
this has me in tears
this ois so honest
and so emotional
you wrote it with love
compassion and pain
and even hope and faith
i am sorry about your mothers death
but death as you know is realy rebirth
its god wanting his daughter back because he mised her too
thank you for entering my contest
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