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Lost Love


Eyes forever open,
waiting for your call.

Empty forsaken birdcage,
only containing silver tears.

Shriveled up candle,
from which only spiders now thrive.

My hand holding your letter,
the one you said you'd come.

But year after year,
at the beginning of every era,
I peer out of my dust-clouded window,
looking for your ride.

Only to find the deserted patio,
lonesome and out of place,
in this new world of life,
from which I do not belong.

As I lie here in my wedding finery,
covered in the webs of time.
I curse my mental tears,
that scream for your soul.



Author notes

Prompt-http://i115.photobucket.com/albums/n296/demolition_lovers91/sad%20love/love.jpg
Contest-10. Anything you want which has a lot of Emotion in it.
"Poetry is the best for letting things out"

A contest entry

Please tell me how i did...

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Comments

1 - 12 of 12

  • leander Moderators member
    March 27, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    You have embedded great imagery thoughout these lines, and I like that. The emotion is powerful, though sad and very painful.

    Thank you for another entry
    Leander


  • xxRainbowDawnxx
    March 26, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    I have been here done that and warn the t shirt I'm afraid. I can feel the pure and utter hurt in this, because I write similar poems to this sometimes when remembering all the times I waited for that special one to show they cared for me, but they never did. Ah well, this is sad and very relatable, maybe too much .


  • Amunet Wolfbane Moderators member
    March 26, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Oh dang, if this doesn't really touch the heart there is something wrong with you. This one stopped me cold like Riveting to say the least.


  • Celticmoon
    March 22, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Interesting concept you have here. The imagery is good. Some stronger than others. Over all not a bad piece of work. Thank you for entering.
    Best of luck to you!


    Blessings
    Bel


  • LadyDementia gold member
    March 15, 2008

    Edit | Reply

    Congrats on the bronze!

    A wonderful piece with beautiful imagery. Goes very well with the picture. Congrats on the bronze and all the best in this contest


  • second-born
    March 14, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    wow...this is so sad and a very sincere write...I imagined someone who is wearing her wedding dress and just waiting for her love...until she is 'covered with cobwebs of time" lovely imageries....indeed


  • LittleMoon silver member
    March 13, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    A lovely but sad write and well blended to the picture. Very well done


  • Devilish Temptation
    March 13, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    As I lie here in my wedding finery,
    covered in the webs of time.
    I curse my mental tears,
    that scream for your soul.

    wow wow that verse very good my friend, it stood out to me, talented piece I just loved all of it well done, emotions it's filled with thankx for entering my contest


  • Ms Raneika
    March 12, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    you did great to answer your question ...your emotion expressed in this piece was appealing to all that craves that special arrival of love ...thanks fr entering my contest much love, Raneika


  • daviscth silver member
    March 4, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    WOW!!! Loved this.


  • swimmeroks
    March 4, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    I love it! i hadn't looked at the picture before reading this, and it painted an identical picture in my mind. Amazing use of imagery!

1 - 12 of 12