Breaking through the
bug-mesh of faith,
Melancholy mosquito
bites all over
Again.
Author notes
Prompt -
"Fake feelings of security
drowning
in an incessant spiral of melancholy"
- Chantell [Tattboyspet]
From her poem Hurting
A contest entry
- 10X13X15 Lets go by Exodus.
450 points, ended February 25, 2008, 5 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Critical Honesty Appreciated, Seriously!
Comments
1 - 6 of 6
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Wow. If it hadn't been for the word 'faith' and the completely new metaphoric meaning that this poem gets in my view due to that, I wouldn't have been so stunned. This is beautiful. I've observed this in 'Pinnacle' too. You've a way of putting a thousand meanings in a few words. Very original inspiration from that prompt.
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hmm........................dont b so depressed, yaar..me alwayz dere for u..if u cn remember me..
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You did it to me again
I have to agree with every comment here! This is great, but then again, you have a way of saying so much with so few words. I love it!!
Best of luck in this contest!!
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itchy good
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Ahh. This is good. Such comfort in faith and sometimes we still get bit. Well done. ~Pamela
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Hmm. I was surprised by this one to be honest. It wasn't until I was reading it through a second time that I realised the word "melancholy" was in the prompt and the poem. Normally it is something that would irritate me but it worked so well I couldn't help but be impressed.
Thank you
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