&& so I bleed myself to sleep,
every single night,
hoping you'll understand I am willing to fight for this,
I am willing to rip out this blinded heart && give it to you....
{just because I love you...}
But behind this mask lies the true liar,
the one person who can't deny nothing unless that nothing is sealed...
&& life seems to shoot at you fast...
thinking it's real, you take the shot...
but [BANG!] there goes your *♥*
A remnant of y/o/u/
was left in M/E/
&& I shatter, when I feel you,
I B.U.R.N myself to H/E/L/L
It irks me to realize you will never be there,
&& when I feel you... [you shun my touch]
Hoping you'd be different,
hoping you'd be reticent with [w/h/a/t/y/o/u/f/e/l/t/4/me/♥]
&& so I was wrong... you are my facade♪
&& this whole scenery...
with lights && w/h/o/r/e/s
is just how society paints this [plastic] world
A perfect Charade....
Look at me with vacant eyes,
tell me I'm you're [s/u/i/c/i/d/e/]
premeditate before you cut my heart again
&& make it bleed... it wants to B/L/E/E/D
NO
M
O
R
E
&& Bleed no
L
E
S
S
In this heart... only a mess,
in this mind nothing to regret...
except the fact that no matter if you [c/u/t] me down,
&& N/E/V/E/R catch me
This hopeless heart will love you and die for you.... ♥always♥
Author notes
"for this broken heart, that always falls for the same old trick... L/O/V/E"
In a list
- A Dirty Pretty Group group list • next in list
A contest entry
- My Broken Heart Lies Bleeding by SchizoChic.
600 points, ended February 29, 2008, 31 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Spill Out Your Heart by KeepingTime.
375 points, ended March 14, 2008, 44 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
&& in the end.... we all die alone...
Comments
1 - 20 of 20
-
&& so I bleed myself to sleep,
every single night,
hoping you'll understand I am willing to fight for this,
I am willing to rip out this blinded heart && give it to you....
{just because I love you...}
Loved this part...and it fits the picutre perfectly. -
You penned some terrific emotional imagery, yanking the reader into the forefront of this piece and making them "feel you".
-
*blinking back almost-tears*...this is a beautiful write. The last line is definitly what got to me. Your a very deep writer. *Hugs* Love hurts....stay strong hun. <3
-
wow great poem...
i like the way you write... keep on writing.. your good at it...
thanks for adding my as a fav... i added you too.. -
**eyes wide open, gulping** wow. that- that was /really/ good. no. not good. perfect. wow.
-
Not bad. I thought you overdid the dirty/pretty to be honest, and that you were pretty cliche, but it did flow nicely, as others have said.
Despite the cliche of it, I liked:
"Look at me with vacant eyes,
tell me I'm you're [s/u/i/c/i/d/e/]" -
i'm in love with this write -- i liked the uncliche way you used self mutilation... and i feel exactly like this right now. i love the first two lines the most though, very unique.
-
Very Nice... I must say. There were a few parts where grammar was an issue, but other than that this was a well written piece.
-
wow
This is very powerful.. kEeP WrItiNg!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
-
Pretty!
Wow that was so good! it flowed really well and had this sense that someone was wispering it in my ear. Thanks for entering! Good luck! -
i love this ...great job
-
Beautiful. It was so raw and full of emotion. I love the pics and everything was amazing. Wow.
-
This is so creative and I am so impressed. Great job here. Best of luck.
-
Beautiful!!!! i loved it... its so deep and sad, you could feel the pain. masterful!
-
... So true...
I love the way you walk the reader down the page... Your words were chosen so carefuly... As if taking every step one at a time... I loved it you did a great job... -
Hey i love the different way you do your writing and the poem was even better =D i give it 3/3 performance
-
wwwoooowwww this was freakin awesome! i love the way you write! the format was completely new and original. just great
-
Major props!!! Much love.
-
This is really deep, and it stressed some of my old views, and who knows I get depressed about my love too sometimes. Anyways, great write!
-
oh... oh... very very quaint, and AWESOME. yagzemash
Adding your comment:
1 - 20 of 20
