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I dont wanna die in pain

now I lay me                  down to sleep                I pray the lord my soul to keep                            If I shall die                    Before I awake              I pray the lord I dont die in pain

A contest entry

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Comments


  • movedon
    May 20, 2008

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    I read it top to bottom "now i lay me, if i shall die, down to sleep........" it worked and flowed just as well!!1 beautiful! two in one!!

    Mylee


  • DestiniesTwined
    March 4, 2008

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    How to say this...I don't like how it deals with religion, but I love how you twisted it at the end. I think you did an excellent job. Thanks for entering my contest. I wish you much luck.


  • Maybe.I.Am.Broken.
    March 4, 2008

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    nice rewrite...
    honestly, i like pain...
    but that's just my twisted way
    But DYING in pain, no...
    brilliant write...

    -Annie Shadows


  • With Broken Wings
    February 25, 2008

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    I like it.. brilliant write.. Its true, really.. Not many people want to die in pain.. I know for one thing I don't wanna die in pain.. I just wanna, well, die.. But, again, not in pain.. Very well written, nice piece.