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destroy

Slashes of passion
restrained wrists
blackened bruises
Taped lips

surprise nightmare
grabbed from sunshine
taken to darkened dungeons
face down drowning
on self pity and tears

Wool-faced pervert
heavily breathing
Enticed and excited
feeding on fear and pain


After tainted climax's
Hollow tips destroy
Identification of the victim
no open casket or mercy




A contest entry

whats your opinion about it?

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Comments

1 - 9 of 9

  • EmmaLuLu
    April 6
    Edit | Reply
    lovly

  • M a r l u x i a
    February 24

    Edit | Reply
    Pretty deep, bro. This has so much metaphor and expression.... like your other writes, this has a handful of detail that one has to be skilled enough to really get the concept... brilliant.


  • RyanosaurusWrecks
    February 24

    Edit | Reply
    Taped lips...shit, why couldnt i have come up with that one?!..lol, I like this, it appeals to my imagination like a naughty girl with a cookie...not really sure why i wrote that, haha


    • bones7
      February 24
      Edit | Reply
      I don't want to know what a naughty girl would do with a cookie.lol
      Thanks for the comment bro.lol

  • Ryno
    February 24

    Edit | Reply
    Chilling... utterly chilling... this is so disgusting its amazing...

    When I said dark poetry... I didn't think you actually meant this!!!

    I loved a lot of your phrasing here, and, once again, the ending was simple yet still very skillful.

    The sad part is how true this is, just there other day this happened to a 12 year old girl 40 minutes from me!!!!! Imagine her parents!!!

    Put poems like this that draw us in and captivated us help us realize the situations enought to speak up.

    Another excellent one!!! Good luck in the contest.

    Ryan


    • bones7
      February 24
      Edit | Reply
      Yeah,This reason alone is why I'm becoming a detective to stop stuff like this happening.

  • storiesuntold gold member
    February 24

    Edit | Reply

    Oh my

    You have the nack for this type of write but do be careful for those who are heavy on drugs or medically depressed look deeper into your writes and finds themselves within its form . But on this write it puts the reader as though I was the oversee're and chills runs up my back .


  • Neha Kaushik
    February 24

    Edit | Reply
    Beautifully written.. nice free flowing words full of dark power.. loved it.. thanks for sharing.. good luck
    God bless ya..

1 - 9 of 9