Again

What was once a humble home
Now lays awake in the ruin
A diamond in the rough
Could never be found here.

A table where a family once enjoyed
Warm cooked meals and joyful chatter
Now broken and in fragments –
The debris shattered across the room.

Evidence of the pain in this world is found all over
Even though this is only one room,
The pain can be seen
By the bloody handprints on the wall – chased by bullet marks.

The sound of plaster breaking under a soldier’s foot
Echoes with an empty silence through the room
As he surveys the room
Of course – no survivors here.

There were never any survivors anywhere in sight
We shot most of them when we found them
Too afraid of what may happen to us
God help those who fled from our panicked attacks.

It’s human nature to survive
Kill or be killed
But I could never help but feel a small sorrow…
I killed all those people.

Look at all this crap in here…
It’s so dirty.
It looks like a tornado hit!
But no, it was only us…

I trace the handprints along the wall…
What if that had been my blood?
I can feel the pain of the victim already
Burning hot on my skin like embers strayed from a fire.

It was I who pulled the trigger,
saw not a human being but a target
a target that was in my way
they must be taken down.

It was I who was shaken by the shock
of the gun in my hands
as I aimed it straight towards her heart
watching in an absent state.

When the little girl cried out and tried to run away
It was I who stalked her down - following the bloody handprints she left on the wall,
Until I found her
And finished the job.

Thinking about it now makes me shudder
Makes me want to empty my insides in one foul heave...
I'm disgusted with myself,
I really am.

And tomorrow,
I'll get up
Shrug it off
And do this all over again.