Scorned by the orange cup cake
Setting on the event horizon
Little Debbie’s sullen brown face
Hid her marshmallow soul
That always lit the night sky
Barren and dry, was her heart
That once spanned…
The watery depths
Between land.
Swept away, were her tears
That were plentiful as grains
Covering all the beaches
Of the blue marble, they circled
The orange cup cake returned
And little Debbie smiled
The sky’s shroud was gone
As their love was rekindled
Author notes
http://cocotapioka.deviantart.com/art/Peach-And-MoonPies-31763434
A Metaphor Within A Metaphor
In a list
A contest entry
- PIF METAPHOR PROMPT CONTEST- Only 10 Poets, closes after 10 entries....This is to PIF for the gold I won in Mr. Penmans contest by Roaddog Wolf.
425 points, ended March 7, 2008, 7 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 6 of 6
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21.55 / 25
I love the creativity in this, though it's not my favourite piece of yours. -
Ha! This is a pretty damn cute write, well done with the metaphor and just plain silliness. I find myself getting silly all the time, any metaphor's that occur in my writes are purely an accident.
Thank you for entering the "Fight for the Gold" contest, best of luck to you Bill... Scott 
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Cute
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haha that was great! i adore all the imagination and originality of your poem! great job! thank you so much for entering my contest and i wish you the best of luck! ~CarnalNineTailedFox
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Great metaphor usage and imagery.an all around great poem!
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surprisingly good write
it took me off step with the Little Debbies but the metaphor was great,
"Swept away, were her tears
That were plentiful as grains
Covering all the beaches
Of the blue marble, they circled" especially enjoyed this stanza . in particularly, the last two lines of it.
Don't see the purpose of caps starting each line, but enjoyed the read,
Thanks for entering and good luck in the contest
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