`
Lately, I sketch spaces
and the matter incarcerated within,
and keep myself unfettered
from the remaining spires of cloud -
existing in powder blue segments
of closed palms.
`
Author notes
Written February 21, 2008
A contest entry
- 5000 points winner takes all. Easy stuff. by Nogod.
5000 points, ended March 3, 2008, 24 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Prewrite Mania 2 by Celticmoon.
450 points, ended April 7, 2008, 64 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - The Ultimate Goal by N e a r.
20000 points, ended June 2, 2008, 946 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 8 of 8
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I truly have no suggestions for improvement upon this piece.
You have a master's touch with short poetry.
More could learn much from your work, I think.
Thank you for entering!
Best of luck to you!
Blessings
Bel
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Nup, confused the hell out of me. I have not one clue as to how this is related to a yesterday, or what type of poem it is.
But, and it's a big (very big) but ..... In 1984 my Mother bought a painting by a fella called Brett Whitely http://www.brettwhiteley.org/ I looked at it, stared at it, walked around it backwards, even turned the lights off and looked at it in the dark! I had no idea of what it represented ( I still have doubts) but it's the best thing I have ever seen on canvas. It's worth a fair sum now. Your poem is kind of the same. I can't work it out, but it's bloody good. I'll give you a silly bronze trophy on one condition.... please don't try to explain yout poem to me, It'll ruin everything I like about it.
Congrats
Dave
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Sounds like the yesterdays seem the same, as do the todays and tomorrows. All blending onto something similar. Very deep.
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OMG... first a splendid "Mal" poem... and now a splendid "Hensley" one! The judge of this contest's gonna worry. Love the vocabulary here, Hen. Brief, yet powerful. Good luck- hope you take those 5000 beauties.
- namita
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Marvelous! Powerful images in this write. To me it described a great sense of freedom and creativity.
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seemingly i feel in this poem a spiral of thoughts in vacuous place...and though the body is idle...it floats among the clouds...breathing...guess what I like most...is i can draw my own conclusion...such as I did...
Mal
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usually when we are busy, our hands are open...
this is a very sad tone to me...
Excellent, as always..
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"sketch spaces" and "closed palms".... i like the way this poem, and especially those lines, allow the reader so many visuals, so many interpretations....either of something lost, something sad...but perhaps also a sense of closeness, of holding on.... you are so good at writing these short but powerful poems, my friend.
~ Nicolette
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