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Party Girl

Missing image

  

She can be found clubbing on a Friday night
dancing with a man on a crowded dance floor
She'll look amazing wearing something tight
She'll draw him in, leave him begging for more
She's a party girl

She can be found with a martini in hand
drinking with friends that love her dearly
She'll be up there singing with the band
She'll be adored by all there clearly
She's a party girl

She can be found wearing the latest fashion
clothes found in top designer fashion shows
She'll find a lover consumed with passion
She'll have a new man before the other goes
She's a party girl

She can be found in a bar smoking
flirting with the handsome bartender
She'll be laughing while hes joking
She'll dazzle anyone with her splendor
She's a party girl

She can be found sniffing a line
with friends she met at the bar
She'll be offered more and decline
She'll stagger back to her car
She's a party girl

She can be found beaten and raped
by the friends that had gotten her high
She'll never realize that she was taped
She'll never trust another guy
She was a party girl

-Lilly

Author notes

I'm not sure how well the repeating fifth line goes with this poem so any advice is appreciated. A link to the site I found the pic on... it is also in google images but here is a link: http://www.bebo.com/PhotoAlbumBig.jsp?MemberId=331361325&PhotoNbr=1&PhotoAlbumId=3674781136

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Comments

1 - 11 of 11

  • jackieO
    November 17
    ?
    Edit | Reply
    Actually this was very well done. In this case I think the repitions worked to it's benifit which is rare for poems wtih many reps as this one. Great Job B.Lilly.

  • Juzjon
    April 9

    Edit | Reply
    It is a very good message you placed here Lilly. Lets just hope a Party Girl reads and understands it.

  • .


    • BrokenLilly silver member
      March 11
      Edit | Reply
      I like it! I didn't feel right saying She's a party girl again so I thought well victim... but "She was a party girl" still says that her partying days are over and sounds a lot more in keeping than she's a victim. Thanks!

  • Peteskid gold member
    March 9

    Edit | Reply
    tragic surprise is the theme here and the message is that it is tragic, but not a surprise...excellent, so very creative...PK

  • Bob Fox
    March 9

    Edit | Reply

    Wow

    sadly this so often happens and then that beauty is wasted forever. Even the older have somehow become part of this putrid scene & it just goes on and on


  • Grateful
    March 9

    Edit | Reply
    amazingly beautiful poem with a great rhyming pattern that carries the very smooth rhythm...thank you

  • cricketjeff gold member
    March 7
    Edit | Reply
    Yes the repeating fifth line works well.


  • Darcness
    February 20
    Edit | Reply
    wow.... this poem is mentos

  • razorbladz
    February 20
    Edit | Reply
    wow

1 - 11 of 11