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Muted


 

 

 

 

 

 

moonlight bleaches
the broken bones
that lie scattered
on shattered dirt.

the ghosts linger
on the window panes,
where the curtains billow
in curdled breaths;
the rooms are stale
despite the breezes.

their spirits freeze,
sitting on tombstones.
praying
for the sweet suffocation
of human flesh.

on the flowers don't grow here
anymore;
yet the poison ivy thrives.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Author notes

Image by googoo450 at deviantart.com

First prompt

In a list

A contest entry

Please tell me what you think

    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression? • Line numbers
    : no Cost: 0 free left 0 points, You have (?) (Line numbers)

Comments

1 - 10 of 10
  • LimelightLiason
    February 23

    Edit | Reply
    oh wow, this write had me in tears when i was reading this. i lost my fiancee back in november of 2006 and this write really embodies the her spirit. she had so much left to say and do in her life but she was tragically muted in a car crash. i love how you poured so much raw emotion into this write. it is practically dripping from my monitor and onto my keyboard. great write, never stop.
    Rob

  • Ryno
    February 23

    Edit | Reply
    Wow that imagery is insane, creative, intense and expressive all at once... you've captured a strong snapshot... strong, strong, strong.

    Congrads on the Bronze.


  • BeautifulFlame gold member
    February 20

    Edit | Reply
    This was so good!

    their spirits freeze,
    sitting on tombstones.
    praying
    for the sweet suffocation
    of human flesh.


  • KnightOfShadows
    February 20

    Edit | Reply
    Great take on the prompt! I loved this poem! Best of luck to you in my contest!


    -Steve-

  • Lost-Rose-Petal
    February 20

    Edit | Reply
    wow! you dont even need a picture with this!
    All of the descriptive words in this totally make a very vivid picture in my mind!
    Great write!
    L-R-P


  • M a r l u x i a gold member
    February 20

    Edit | Reply
    This is phenominal.
    Truly a write worth gold.
    Let's hope for the best.
    Bookmarking.

  • Starz of Heaven gold member
    February 20
    Edit | Reply
    This is an amazing take on the prompt goodluck in the contest much love


  • poppa silver member
    February 20
    Edit | Reply
    Woah...this is a great poem....think you have done an awesome job on the prompt ....good luck...


  • creationsfromheart silver member
    February 20
    Edit | Reply
    aww I like this and like how you combined your pic with the ivy into the other pic.


  • Valley Girl gold member
    February 20

    Edit | Reply
    Great use of prompt! Good luck in the contest, also thanks for commenting on my write as well.
1 - 10 of 10