potatoes and gravy

this afternoon
legs dangling from the pool table
white noodles on a plate grow cold

Ben Folds saying what he says
after he's finished I click off the stereo
listening to thoughts skim across the
reflecting pool
(of you) inside my head

trying to tell you what I said I'd tell you
thinking of things you'd like to hear because I said them
like

you are the missing tooth I laid under my pillow when I was six
been gone so long
something different laid in it's place
I've never forgotten
my tongue's plea to fill raw gap with itself
-with anything-
numbness and electricity at the same time
waited impatiently
my gap was filled
(with lies)
waited all the while knowing you were there somewhere
now that you're here

I can forget what it's like
to be
missing

that said

two nights ago
you completed the piece of art that's plagued my hand since I learned to write
if it hurt you to be a part of something
pertaining to my ties to misconception
it didn't show

it made me wish someone strange would bring up courage in a conversation
so I could say
"Courage?  You wanna talk about COURAGE...?"
so I could launch into an excited rendition of you
what you do for me
what you did that night

getting to the fucking point, now
one I've been getting to for my entire life:

you are everything I've ever wanted in another human being
we are one person in two bodies
your favorite socks
piano keys and bit-down fingernails

potatoes and gravy

Brandon and Blue.