She walks this long road alone
And comes to this fork in the road.
She looks up and says give me the direction to perfection.
She takes the road on the right thinking that's the road.
She thinks I'm never turning back.
Turning back to the way things use to be.
Somethings seem so perfect but why do they have to go so wrong.
I just never thought any of this would hurt that bad.
She keeps walking along thinking why I'm scared of not being with you.
It just doesn't make sense all of this.
She wishes this dark road would en soon but she doesn't think it will.
She thinks every step I take I leave a small piece of myself behind; soon there will be nothing left.
She thinks I'm never turning back.
Turning back to the way things use to be.
Somethings seem so perfect but why do they have to go so wrong.
I just never thought any of this would hurt that bad.
Suddenly she just stops and looks at the sky.
She smiles slightly and says we don't need wings to be angels.
She says to the stars I'm going to smile like nothings wrong, act like its all a dream, and pretend its not hurtin me.
She prays and says maybe just maybe everything will be okay...
She thinks I'm never turning back.
Turning back to the way things use to be.
Somethings seem so perfect but why do they have to go so wrong.
I just never thought any of this would hurt that bad.
She walks to the end of the road and looks straight ahead.
She sees a grave and it says to my long lost love i love you.
Just as she sees that she falls on her knees and says i'd like to take the time I lost and give it back to you.
Her tears slowly fall and she whispers I'm sorry I was to late.
She thinks I'm never turning back.
Turning back to the way things use to be.
Somethings seem so perfect but why do they have to go so wrong.
I just never thought any of this would hurt that bad.
She looks up at the stars once more and sighs and says i know your always with me where ever I go.
I will always know that only you, can tell that my smile is fake...and right now its not cause i remember everything we went through and I'm so proud of you.
She says I'm sorry we couldn't have that night on the beach...
She thinks I'm never turning back.
Turning back to the way things use to be.
Somethings seem so perfect but why do they have to go so wrong.
I just never thought any of this would hurt that bad.
She says I remember everything that me and you talked about.
Me and you had out whole lives planned out together. And if I could, I would, turn back the hands of time and correct all my mistakes that I ever did.
But not I guess I gotta move on, right?
It's still hard and I still love you til this day.
She says so this is my last goodbye, right?
Did you know I kept all of your pictures.
I don't have the strength to part with them yet.
I've tried to erase the way your kisses taste.
But sometimes I can't forget.
She looks at the grave one last time and kneels next to it and kisses it and a tear falls on the stone.
She says a little quiet, this is my last tear I will cry for you.
You may think that your a memory to me but your so much more...
I love you...
*all the words in bold.italic are random quotes i found...
A contest entry
- immeasurable. by girl shaman.
1150 points, ended February 24, 2008, 33 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
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Somethings
should be 'some things'
instead of 'have to go so wrong'
try 'have to go wrong'
-you really dont need the so in the sentence.
third stanza where you put 'why i'm scared' it should be 'why am i scared'
& the next sentence where you wrote 'it just doesnt make sense all of this' there should be a semi colon between make sense & all of this or try putting 'all of this just doesn't make sense'
'this dark road would en' should be end.
also all the times you put the word use; it should be used.
as for the poem; i really dont know if this was meant to be in a form? or a song? but you kind of lost it there and there were a few too many stanzas. but thats just my opionion.
also id suggest you'd calm down on the 'she' and try other means of referring to yourself or whoever you are talking about in the poem.
but all in all i think you did well
thank you for entering !
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this sounds like a song because you kept repeating that one stanza.i didnt like that.i really like the fifth and twelvth stanzas alot. i think in the first stanza you use the word road too much it makes it sound awkward.but this is really sad and even though i think it needs a little work it made me feel somthing when i read it.and thats what poetry is supposed to do.rig
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