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Breakable words can drain from fragile lips

Sitting in the bathtub, water filled high,
Inching further into the water, sure to soon die.
Holding my breath as long as I can
My oxygen’s getting low, how much more can I stand?
My mind is turning black
Realizing I can never go back.
The suicide note is taped to the mirror
To make things a little clearer.

"To whom this may concern,
Clear your throat, my words might burn.
See no one knows what I go through.
Hearing mommy scream from daddy’s hits,
Would make you do this too.
And please, don’t pretend like you couldn’t see.
Who wears long sleeve shirts when it's 90 degrees?
And hearing sissy cry in the middle of the night,
Because she’s afraid of the dark and there’s no lights.
I’d whisper that it will all be okay, I love you a lot.
She’ll whisper back, “I just want daddy to stop,
Mommy’s pain to ease,
But daddy’s too hard to please.
I want you to be happy again,
I just want things to go back to the way they have always been.”
Things used to never be this bad,
Never once have I had,
To go to school with a black eye.
Making up stories every time I’m asked why.
So as I sit in this bath of death,
Just waiting, patiently waiting to take my last breath.
I can no longer live my life of lies,
I cant take all the tears that I have cried.
Maybe once I’m gone dad I hope you understand
You should stop hitting mom and lower your hand.
So dad this part is for you,
And everything you put me through.
You made my life a living hell,
And I pray to God you go there as well.
Now mom please forgive me,
I want you to know, this wasn’t easy.
Tell sissy I’ll leave the lights on,
And tell her not to cry when I’m gone."

As I wait outside heavens gate in this long line,
Hearing God call out names, everyone but mine.
I walk up to him, asking why my name is not there.
He tells me to calm down and not to be scared.
He said there’s a different place for those like me,
The ones who take their life in order to be free.
I can see your reaction when you see me in the tub,
I feel horrible because now I know I was loved.
I cant help but break down in tears,
But as I do the pain finally clears.

Author notes

absolutebrightness




**I am in no way suicidal, this poem does not reflect my life. I have never meet my father and I dont have a younger sister.**

A contest entry

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Comments

1 - 6 of 6

  • FallenFromGrace1102
    October 2, 2008

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    heart wrenchingly pain. i loved this write it was so beautiful. it holds a spot in my heart. i can relate to this. keep it up. i wish you the best of luck in my contest and thank you for entering this piece. i really liked the lines:

    "Things used to never be this bad,
    Never once have I had,
    To go to school with a black eye.
    Making up stories every time I’m asked why."

    *~*bee*~*


  • Symphony
    October 2, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    "I’d whisper that it will all be okay, I love you a lot.
    She’ll whisper back, “I just want daddy to stop,
    Mommy’s pain to ease,
    But daddy’s too hard to please."

    tragically heartbreaking you wrote this well!


  • Metaphorist
    September 28, 2008

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    I enjoyed this somewhat fiction piece. It seemed very believable and heartbreaking. Thanks for entering and good luck!


  • Lil-Bit Crazy
    May 31, 2008

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    wow...... this is so very awefully sad but a very awesome write.... you did a great no wait way more then great of a job here....! congrats on the bronze well deserved...!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  • depressedangelchick
    May 30, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    thar was really beautiful and sad at the same time, i think this poem was wonderful.


  • xxRainbowDawnxx
    April 27, 2008
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    awww this is such a sad piece... maybe based on real feelings? I hope not, but too many people go through stuff like this, I just hope that you can learn from your pain and feel less of the agony... it's nothing that I'd wish on anyone and it hurts to even hear of it. Always here if need someone to talk to.

1 - 6 of 6