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Sheer Bliss

Loving you...
is like drinking sweet nectar
so tasty and luscious
you say I am the forbidden fruit
you so want to devour
a delicasy to the tastebuds
you undress me with hungry eyes
telling me I never looked so enticing
your hands grope for me
with undeniable desire
I feel your thighs press against mine
the hardness of your flesh between my legs
what a ravishing appetite you have!
I, too, am hungry as I take you in
our bodies move
like the waves in the ocean...
thus, we climax together
pure ecstasy
my ownself be forever
devoted to you

Author notes

Labeled as Adult and I chose prompt #3

A contest entry

I want readers to give me honest feedback and any suggestions you may have.

    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
    • Line numbers  • Invite them to read
    : no Cost: 0 free left 0 points, You have (?)

Comments

1 - 20 of 20

  • exithere
    November 22, 2008

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    i like it. its a nice entry and dnt worry u wnt b DQd for no authors name in notes. lol i dnt rly care about that i only have it as rule for if i rly like the poem and want to read more from the poet. so yeah good job, nice entry and good luch in contest. thnx for the message it showd ur actual consideration in contest


  • daviscth silver member
    October 27, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    You did a wonderful job with this prompt. Your imagery is very well done. It was a pleasure reading this dear.


  • whispernthedark Greeters member
    October 11, 2008

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    Passionate write, thank you for entering the contest. Good luck.

    ♥
    whisper


  • Iridessa MoonFlower
    October 5, 2008

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    Wow! I was very intrigued by this one. I enjoyed every single last word. Thank you for following the rules & letting me know which picture you wrote about. Good luck in the contest. In Love & Light... Blessed Be! ~~Iridessa MoonFlower~~

  • whispernthedark Greeters member
    September 6, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    This comes off as more of an "aww, that's so sweet" rather than being sexy or sensual, and the last stanza doesn't seem to mesh with the rest of the poem. It is a nice write though. Thank you for entering the contest.

    ♥
    whisper


  • Brazos silver member
    April 20, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Very erotic, and you certainly captured the picture well. I didn't care for the switch to olde English in the next-last-line, I thought it was a bit late for that. Otherwise, a very nice write.

    Thanks for entering, and good luck in the contest.

    Novy and Brazos


  • ennovy silver member
    April 19, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    What a wonderful piece you ahve shared of pure lust..and erotica.....thank you for entering our contest........novy


    • sunflowers21573
      April 20, 2008
      Edit | Reply
      Thank you for your kind words and for letting me take part in your contest.


  • Wingsy
    March 24, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    wow! i cant say i was at all expecting that when i first started reading! This was really well done! your word choses were great! This also made me blush a bit as well! but it was vary well done!

    Good luck in the contest!
    great write!


  • UnManned4Ever
    March 18, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    this is a really good poem. i like it. I must admit it made me blush a bit, but great write and flow and good luck in the contes


  • jcat gold member
    February 28, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    This was actually very lovely. I much enjoyed the way this read. Very well done and best of luck in the contest! Thank you for entering


    • sunflowers21573
      March 1, 2008
      Edit | Reply
      Thank you for your nice compliment and I'm glad you enjoyed reading my poem. Your words mean alot to me.


  • alaskanamber
    February 25, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Ok so my mind does something incredibly naughty with the line "is like drinking sweet nectar
    so tasty and luscious". At first I thought it was from a mans perspective and I read on I realized how very wrong I was. Nice work. Goo luck.


  • vena sera
    February 24, 2008
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    definitly hooking. wonderful. certainly not boring. GREAT JOB


  • HaileeDear
    February 20, 2008

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    I felt so much power in this. This had so much emotion. Great (and interesting) write. you had me hooked. you didnt get boring with it. wonderful job.
    xoxo
    pixie


    • sunflowers21573
      February 20, 2008
      Edit | Reply
      I am so glad you liked this piece. I was hoping it had some spark to it. Thank you for such a nice critique.


  • Tercil gold member
    February 18, 2008

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    The appetite in this is enough to sap both parties, here, we have a loyalty in a sense which is bewilderment, the fact remains that whioe the flow of this persists, I'm sure there will be much in return, well, done!


  • Galaxy2
    February 17, 2008
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    Wow! What passions!
    Makes me feel as if you're talking to me...
    Every line expresses the enjoyment you had...
    Thanks for sharing the enjoyment, honey!...
    It's an interesting write...with lustful emotions...and a touch of reality...

    Kisses, my dear!

    Galaxy2

    • sunflowers21573
      February 18, 2008
      Edit | Reply
      Thank you for your compliments. I don't even know what posessed me to write this, it just popped into my brain. I am glad you liked it!

1 - 20 of 20