questions

Are you speaking to me, God?
'cause I think I hear you say.
The time has come to let it go
To give this pain away

This suffering which defined me
My whole identity was strife
You're saying that's not who I am
I have a better, brighter life.

Why do I cling to my despair?
And never let it leave my heart?
When I stand not to lose, but gain
A great hope and a fresh new start.

Yet still I linger and delay
I'd rather sit and wallow
The new path's way is scaring me
but this old life seems hollow.

I try to listen to your call
I want to tell someone.
but that would mean I've lost the game
It would be saying that they won.

Help God I beg of you.
allow me the strength to be weak.
For only when I am humbled
will I find the answers I seek.

Author notes

I've just been having a hard time escaping some of the bitterness that plagued me in high school, and I know God wants me to forgive and move on, but I'm hesitant.