The eyes that drink the music that I think
The way they capture everything of me
You sit and look and read me like a book
I'm captured in your gaze and so I'm free
Across the room however deep the gloom
Your eyes can see the slightest thing I do
Within your sight my heart is always light
Reflecting all the radiance of you
Rehearsed each day I chance to cross your way
A love that's built on music from inside
So very soon you're bound to sing my tune
Within your thoughts I'll never try to hide
With soft replies you stifle little cries
Your diamond eyes can always hear my sighs
Author notes
Dancing dreams is the partner poem.
I have no idea what sort of sonnet I would call that, but I know it is a sonnet!
In a list
A contest entry
- Double up ( for Rhyming poetry only) by Legend.
2800 points, ended February 25, 34 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 18 of 18
-
I too have no idea as to what type of sonnet this is ( that is immaterial) it is just a wonderful piece.I love the internal rhyme Excellent Good luck in the
contest
Please do not reply to this comment as i wish to keep the contest Anonymous If you have not entered your second poem please do so making sure to name this one in your authors notes Thank you -
English Sonnet I think
And one that is well done and a joy to read.
Jim
-
-
I thank-you for the compliment but not a Shakesperian (abab cdcd efef gg) often called English here which is a silly name as many of the other forms are just as English!. This I think is new. It rhymes
aa,B,cc,B dd,E,ff,E gg,H,ii,H jj,jj
Lower case letters indicating internal rhymes. So perhaps thecouplet should be indicated jJ,jJ
-
I thank-you for the compliment but not a Shakesperian (abab cdcd efef gg) often called English here which is a silly name as many of the other forms are just as English!. This I think is new. It rhymes
aa,B,cc,B dd,E,ff,E gg,H,ii,H jj,jj
Lower case letters indicating internal rhymes. So perhaps thecouplet should be indicated jJ,jJ
-
-
Thank you for your entry
-
wow this beautiful..it made my heart melt seriously you have a strong talent and I hope to read more from you soon...it had the beat to it and it just flowed of my lips...amazing amazing amazing!!!!!!
tash -
Greenian.
-
As Shakespeare himself said
A rose by any other name
Would still smell as sweet
Whatver the form of this sonnet
'Tis true to say it's
When all said and done
Still a sonnet and not a bonnet
Indeed a sweet and sincere rhyme
Which makes the reader feel fine
Hip hip hooray and Bravo
Good luck in the contest
This is the Way to Go! -
-
We'll have you a fully fledged rhyme and flow Gal yet!
-
-
wow, i was completely drawn to this poem in the featured poems list from the title. this is a great sonnet! well done!
-
This is a beautiful contemporary sonnet with a wonderful flow and meter. The imagery is captivating and the meter simply dances. You did a wonderful job of carrying the theme throughout the entire piece. Well done!
Love,
Amera
-
I cannot critique this poem as a scholar, or for that matter, anyone who really knows anything about structure and form, but I do know that I enjoyed reading this and it made me feel good.
All the best in the contest
Love
Sue
x
-
You are the best peot ever and I want you to touch my body. Take me now Jeff! hee hee hee that work for you?
. Rewarded 4
-
This is a wonderful piece of poetry. A sonnet only we ourselves love to change. Great job on it and in making me feel the connection, except my eyes are DARK lmao.
Best wishes to you in this contest.
LS
-
Beautiful sonnet
This is a beautiful poem written with the ink of your emotions. The images couldn't be more vivid as this. Which is why it's such a nice piece. Honesty and sincere expression is the essence of such a work which is why I love poetry. No two poems are the same even when written by the same person. Because the next momment we may feel very different than before. You called this a sonnet so a sonnet it is. -
Sending you I.M.
The eyes that drink the music that I think
The way they capture everything of me
You sit and look and read me like a book
I'm captured in your gaze and so I'm free
Across the room however deep the gloom
Your eyes can see the slightest thing I do
Within your sight my heart is always light
Reflecting all the radiance of you
Rehearsed each day I chance to cross your way
A love that's built on music from inside
So very soon you're bound to sing my tune
Within your thoughts I'll never try to hide
With soft replies you stifle little cries
Your diamond eyes can always hear my sighs
. Rewarded 8
-
Emotional intimacy
Your work, actually, shows a connection to someone. Deep relationships grow and mature almost to a point of being undescribable. Itimacy should be worked for and cherished. I think, you think so, too
. Rewarded 4
-
amazing poem! it had everything in it like a great ending and ryhming and a great topic!
Rehearsed each day I chance to cross your way
A love that's built on music from inside
So very soon you're bound to sing my tune
Within your thoughts I'll never try to hide
Great part ↑↑↑↑↑↑↑↑↑↑↑↑↑↑↑
~Ruth~
Adding your comment:
1 - 18 of 18
