.:In love-The Pain:.

picture this:
introduction - the pain. the agony sweeps in like a dust mite,
climbing slowly, emphasising each possible ounce of pain that can be produced
digging into the skin, slowly..so slowly...inching the way in
like a snake biting, crawling underneath the layers of your skin, digging
its sharp razor edged teeth into the lush, red, skin underneath your skin
but you don't bleed.
picture this:
starting- lingering body unable to move one spilt second of a millisecond, or
youre drenched in downpours of unbearable "gut my fucking heart out" pain, the snake bites burning, flesh eating up flesh, bubbling like the sun bubbles and trickles and drips into the dark dark spacious sky, enlightening it with twinkle drops of hot morphine liquid..dots...impressed into your skin each numbered, each calibrated, each signed off, checkbox, x marks the spot..creating a still staggered pattern of pain. just like Orion. pain so painfully indulgent like chocolate addicted to chocolate. everything to the second power, multiplied, divided and then extracted to the sweetest, deepest deep meaning of the very syllables that make up the word pain. the ambient sun suffocating, caving in to it self, perfectly pure all to just seest to exist at a ironically random time like 3:30 in the mistaken morning. thoughts rushing in all to quickly, all to ecstatically, like a radio that transmits nothing BUT static electricity, made for no other purpose..and each twitch of static that vibrates off the icy cold windows into bleeding ear sockets traps all voices inside your head, allowing nothing to be heard or said but the things all ready said, the things already spoken, nothing new to ever be open like the same Christmas over and over again with the same presents you got last year. each word colliding and bumping into each other, mortified like twins separated at birth meeting for the first time, though knowledge of these words the pain of the words never escapes, never lowers in levels and agony that caused all this chaotic chaos in the very beginning, and yet we indulge in this, sacrifice for this, crave for this, addicted for this...would give anything for all of this, or one measly tiny crack-corner portion of this..this shit that twists up our heads and unsuspectingly sets off a switch that makes us insane without six drinks.

in the end its all worth it.
because i do not just simply mistakenly love you.
i am IN love with you. i fall at the highest cliff, off the scarest pinnacle of a bridge, i fall into a sea of probable unfortunate events, mixed and shaken with fear, stirred with every emotion maximized and mortified by a million and four times

...in love.




© 2008, Angie Romans. All rights reserved.
No republication of this material, in any form or medium, is permitted without express permission of the author.