Wickedness lurks around every corner,
A child full of life, the perfect prey.
Faith and merriment, her only defense,
She still possesses the light to guide her way.
But as the light begins to fade,
with life's trials and tribulations,
Darkness will try to strike,
it strives for complete annihilation.
Should darkness triumph and heaven starts to cry
it begins to rain, for innocence has died.
A contest entry
- *Anything* by xcoldxtruthx.
300 points, ended March 10, 2008, 13 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Singin in the Rain by ForeverNightMusic.
500 points, ended April 10, 2008, 18 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - PW Party by Blooming Poet.
300 points, ended May 23, 2008, 10 entries
Silver trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Rain. Rain. Rain. by rosie4491.
450 points, ended August 7, 2008, 33 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 8 of 8
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WOW - Very strong poem. Kind of in-your-face emotion.. but not in an obnoxious way. Wonderful pen. Best of luck in my contest.
Keep it up =] -
_No_ Creativity / Originality
_Yes_ Imagery
_Yes_ Metaphor
_Yes_ Emotion
_Yes_ Reaction
_Yes_ Relatability
_Yes_ Fluency
_No_ Powerful Beginning
_Yes_ Powerful Middle
_Yes_ Powerful Ending
_Yes_ Connecting Ideas
_Yes_ Interesting Idea Behind Piece and/or a Message Behind Piece
_Yes_ Interesting In General (Does Not Bore) -
wow
the poem it's self is short and simple
but it made me think deeply for quite a while
love it ! very, very relatable
thanks for entering my contest
and good luck
morgan
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Thanks for the gold! I've been having a rough week and it brought a little sunshine.
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Reading the poem from beginning to end, rain stands out strikingly as a metaphor and is aptly portrayed too with words as 'light begins to fade'[which is the setting in of rain];and 'heaven starts to cry'[which is the actual pouring down of rain].The theme of wickedness is not lost too.A fascinating piece.
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thank you
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Wow this is amazing, but I would edit ot 10 words if you can so you can have a chance of winning. But a really great write very thought provoking. good luck
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Oops - 10 words not 10 lines... x
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