Every line
every etch
Every swirl
every mark
Every sketch
every spot
Every color
every hue.
This is me.
An array artists composed my face
adding depth, sorrow, and joy.
Painted the colors of my soul
melancholy, innocent, blissful,
furious, envious, smitten
Each color blends together
overlapping and succeeding to
diminish the importance of its peers.
This magnum opus
executed and perfected
was too fragile
too pure for the world.
Fear of rejection
criticizing words to bite the soul
produced a shroud
a facade meant to please
all those but the one it covered.
But those colors
too long submerged
swelled and became spasmodic,
especially pride
too long shrouded in the dark
forgotten
fought its away above the rest
to dwell in the back of the mind
whispering invigorating ideas
the break away the lies.
The coherent voice finally wins,
the veil is stripped away!
And now I show you
with no more deceptions,
who I truly am,
a face
made from
a line,
an etch,
a swirl,
a mark,
a sketch,
a spot,
a color,
a hue
all cohering to this magnum opus
my face with its facade.
This is me.
Author notes
Breezie
(4) http://ohparapraxia.deviantart.com/art/Elijah-Wood-76980109
A contest entry
- Poets Survivor 3 - Preliminary Round #1 - Invite Only by Ryno.
625 points, ended February 22, 2008, 20 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Anything goes. by still.she.waits.
600 points, ended April 1, 2008, 113 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - be by ArtFullyMe.
2400 points, ended May 25, 2008, 31 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - The Ultimate Goal by N e a r.
20000 points, ended June 2, 2008, 946 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - round one (for everyone) prewrite contest ENTER ENTER ENTER (AND YES THAT MEAN'S YOU too by serenity silvermoon.
927 points, ended February 16, 1509 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 8 of 8
-
wow i felt this to be a powerful write it made me feel the texture keep doing well
love the rev papa

-
Please don't be despaired; would like to see you next season.
Thank-you. 
Ryan -
Yes
I thought you should much improvement from the previous round with your phrasing & originality. This proves to me that you can only continue to grow.
Not to mention your sentiments were luring & enriching. -
Yes, I enjoyed this one and although simple style, the format and thoughts were engaging and I though overall well executed. good luck
-
No
I hate to say no because I really enjoyed your piece. I thought the structure was effective (the repeated lists) and that certain phrases were really striking. I especially liked the idea of the colors that had been overlapped vieing for attention and asserting themselves pridefully. Excellently contrived!
Unfortunately, I thought a couple of the stanzas were just to simple and uninvolved. You told them to me, but I wasnt able to experience them for there wasnt a certain something to draw me in emotionally or with the senses.
All the best to you. We'll see what the other judges say!
-
Wow... I really enjoyed your piece. To me, it really came alive, though I think it could have done with a few less adjectives. The imagery here was just... WOW! Well done, and good luck!
Laura
xxx
-
No
-
omg... you've got no idea...
THIS IS BEAUTIFUL
THIS IS GREAT
I LOVED THIS SOOOOOO MUCH
srry for the caps
wow
im gonna read this one a few more times.
haha

1 - 8 of 8





