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[ Nights spent alone ]

Nights spent alone
(Im so alone)
Thinking of you
(And the words you said)
Maybe you were right
(Im such a bitch)
My tears always falling
(Crying is getting overrated)
So alone without you
(Why'd you have to go?)
Nights alone
(So alone)
Will you ever come home
(Please come home)
My heart has a spot saved
(Saved for you)
Always will you be there
(In my heart)

A contest entry

Please, tell me what you think.

    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
    • Line numbers  • Invite them to read
    : no Cost: 0 free left 0 points, You have (?)

Comments

1 - 10 of 10

  • speakno3vil
    March 21
    Edit | Reply
    very good, maybe thats why you have more trophy's than me


    • brittany.geeze
      March 21
      Edit | Reply
      I have more trophies than you because I've been on her longer than you.
      Plus I get lucky.

      Thanks though!

      btw, how are you?


  • morgana raven Greeters member
    January 5

    Edit | Reply
    I like this a lot, wish you could use italics on the bits in brackets i think itd look smoother. Anyhow, great write.
    Laura


  • skye101
    December 27, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    i like the after thought thing, well, i view it as an after thought. different but a good different. i like the last two lines the most, always wil you be there, in my heart sounds sorta like they're still around and then the last lines like they're not.


  • aboomer silver member
    October 13, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    I liked this. The way I read it, I 'heard' your lines - then the line set in paranthesis (like you were thinking that thought, or saying it under your breath). Very effective way to do this!

    Well done on emotions and images.


  • Rose Darkest Night
    August 25, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Hmm....though I enjoyed this one a lot, it seemed almost like you used a lot of components, that could come off as overused or clique.

    It's great write, but to me, it's just not really hitting me deep down where I'm thinking it's meant to be. It's obvious your longing is portrayed in a beautiful way, but even beauty can not hide some secrets or problems.

    Though I really enjoyed this one despite, so I will be looking back on it.


  • xXxIceQueenxXx
    July 15, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    ooo I like this! I love the (words) it's kind of like an after thought.....like what you say and (what you really want) amazing!!


  • Kelli Marie
    February 15, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    A sad and emotional piece of poetry. I enjoyed the read very much. I think you did a great job. Best of luck in the contest.
    Kelli


  • ChicaBoo
    February 15, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    i liked this. very much. and i can definitely relate. thank you for entering this, glad i inspired you
    best of luck

1 - 10 of 10