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.:Smile Summer Sunshine:.

Smile summer sunshine,
as anemic amphibians
react to your radiant rays
smile summer sunshine
picture the perfect photosynthesis
hiding high in the vapor h20
just metaphors for a bulimic girl
the windy wings left untamed
sifted sugar shoulder blades
scared and scathed from
ruined remains of rugged rag dolls
smile summer sunshine =]
eyeslashes entering eternal wishes
frosted flakes floating from my fingers
slipping and sliding on the sizzling snow
howling then hiding, heating hot chocolate
smile summer sunshine
prickly pencils pressing on paper
cracking knuckles, chuckling chuckles
typing total technical stutter-able nonsense,
smile summer sunshine
pathetically passing time with poetry
scrounging and scratching as school

dwindles my delightful daydreams

and unyielding yells at my yo-yo

reclining out, ripping the ripe orange

enjoying my exotic ecstasy of eternity

as the summer sunshine smiles on me

smile summer sunshine =].. 





© 2008, Angie Romans. All rights reserved. No republication of this material, in any form or medium, is permitted without express permission of the author.

Author notes

yayz

I know this isnt a technical form of poetry but it does have a pattern and it is different..hope you like it

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Comments

1 - 12 of 12

  • xPink-Lotusx
    March 10, 2008
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    Interesting. I like this simply because it is different! Well done!


  • Gothik Prynce
    March 8, 2008
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    This poem is rich in detail, and it has both the good and the evil. The light and the dark.


  • whbybel
    March 8, 2008

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    me likes your poem

    no nmeed to spell check, dont care about the style, only your skills get higher and higher, change all your words and change the meaning of what you say. You got a request for a new friend today, I want to watch your poems and how they progress, becxuase i think this poem is one of the best

  • Kyo-N
    March 6, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Ehm... this doesn't deserve to be called "Alliteration". Maybe you can reconsider it and call this "Misliteration", a new form of poetry, consisting in patterns of alliteration varying line by line.
    I didn't like the =] there.


    • EatYourSunlight
      March 7, 2008
      Edit | Reply
      But its still alliteration..and i thought the =] goes well with the poem since it is "smile summer sunshine" ;] ;]


  • lost in silence
    February 28, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    It's very good, but all the alliteration really ties and twist my tongue in knots. (lol) Nice work.

  • Zyskandar A Jaimot
    February 25, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    good alliteration good assonance prickly pencils fortuitously float not-on nets on in our daydreams thanks for sharing regards zaj


  • Gypsie Ink
    February 19, 2008
    Edit | Reply

    Enchanting!

    You wisk me away upon wispy wonders...a following fortold to favor frequently

  • Zyskandar A Jaimot
    February 19, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    good assonance/alliteration day dreaming is always so tiring! ha! different/original good write thanks for sharing regards zaj

  • yourguardianangel
    February 17, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    This is quite unusual..not necessarily in a bad way, but I haven't been exposed to a style like yours. I'm not a very big fan of alliteration, especially in large quantities, as you've used it. However, I do like the you maintained consistency throughout the course of the poem and I found some instances of alliteration..well..favorable. typing total technical stutter-able nonsense and smile summer sunshine were two of my favorite. Out of curiousity, is this your style of writing? or do you adhere to other forms of poetry in addition to alliteration?

    • EatYourSunlight
      February 17, 2008
      Edit | Reply
      Thankyou =] I like to add alliteration to many of my poems..i think its a great substitute for rhyme but usually my style is whatever comes to my head =P


  • Commodore Rouge
    February 17, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Oh, I like this very much! I love the alliterations, they add A LOT of character to this poem, and help it become what it is. The title is very catchy, I don't always read the poetry "advertised" on the side of the page, but your title caught my eye, and I suppose though I need to work on the titling with my work, this was a great example of a superb title. Good job!

1 - 12 of 12